Thursday, January 31, 2002

Chelsea is busily persuading me to get a very expensive cellular phone to go with the iBook.

I am still wondering if I should toss my application and interview out the window and go be a mother in Portland. I don't think crucifying myself is a good idea...but it casts a shadow on my standards for loyalty.

Wednesday, January 30, 2002

all I know is that if you have the program loaded and on, it will tell you who's on. There's a little running guy icon on the bottom right of my screen. I click on him.

weez: what's your AIM? I forgot to save it last night.

Zach or someone else who is web savvy: how can I tell when one of you is on? I didn't get a message or see any kind of notification. Is it under settings or something?

I had a long ass day today. Got to work before 8, then as I was leaving at 5:05 my boss says, "Don't go anywhere yet. Award entries are due tomorrow, and we may need your help." I worked until after freakin 7 p.m. Tomorrow looks like a long ass day, too. Phew!

Whoa. A cake for a king WITH A BABY BAKED IN IT. Christians are weird.

I had so much fun last night that now I absolutely must buy an iBook although I have no idea how I'm going to pay for it.

i got spaghetti works pizza and a side salad and we got breadsticks with dippers. then we got a free dessert pizza-- heathbar. it was dee.lish.
i'm so tired from staying up so late last night, but i'm also really hyper (i think it's the weather)...

a friend asked me this morning when my last day of work was, when i replied him (through e.mail) i got butterflies in my stomach. he told me to get drunk at work today so i wouldn't feel it. the thing is...i'm so sleepy+hyper, i already feel drunk. i don't need the substances. i can do it on my own.

oh... speaking of which... seen Jeb Bush's daughter lately? ouch.

3 more hours to go.... the boys are making fun of me saying i have the worst senoritis. it's true.

last night was good. hehehe.

Got called away to go to court today. There is a sexual discrimination suit against the university, and I heard the plantiff's story today. I have never been to court before so it was kinda neat.

I'm sorry I missed the IM goodness. But since my computer at home has effectively died, I wouldn't have been able to join in anyway. Also, I wasn't home. My old philosophy professor was giving a lecture on "Religion in Ancient Greek Poetry" and after that I went and watched the new Buffy episode.

to keep steph and JT in the loop... last night was amazing fun!!!! i AM an internet junkie...and that was a great fix. i'm still kinda running high on that one. *what a geek*
it ended up that zach, louise, mike, angie, shelly and myself (did i miss anyone?) were on IM at the same time, so we started one big chat room. it was crazy fun! i think we tried calling both of you to join us... but we were unsuccessful on both counts.

so the boys are taking me to this awesome pizza place called Pieworks for my going away party at work. mmmmm, pizza.
it's going to be 79 degrees today. it is SOOOOOOOOO beautiful outside. i'm a little intoxicated by that too. i want to go home and ride the blue bullet (my new bike) all around town.

Weezie - here's what the web site had to say about King Cakes: (mmmm, king cakes)

In European countries, the coming of the wise men bearing gifts to the Christ Child is celebrated twelve days after Christmas. The celebration, called Epiphany, Little Christmas on the Twelfth Night, is a time of exchanging gifts and feasting. All over the world people gather for festive Twelfth Night celebrations. One of the most popular customs is still the baking of a special cake in honor of the three kings..."A King's Cake."
Tradition has now evolved through time to obligate the person who receives the baby (inside every King Cake!) to continue the festivities by hosting another king cake party.
King Cakes were originally a simple ring of dough with little decoration. Gambino's has developed its own special recipe as a signature item to become The King of King Cakes.®
The King Cake is made with a rich Danish dough, baked and covered with a poured sugar topping and decorated with the traditional Mardi Gras-colored sugars. The end result is a delicious and festive cake in traditional Rex colors: Purple, representing Justice; Green, representing Faith; Gold, representing Power. Hundreds of thousands of King Cakes are consumed at parties every year, making the King Cake another fine Louisiana tradition. A Mardi Gras party just wouldn't be a Mardi Gras party without a King Cake!

Shelly, Mike, so sorry for leaving so abruptly - I kept getting booted and I dunno if you got my IM's. Had a blast!

Tuesday, January 29, 2002

I wonder how you can find out what other partners use AIM. I would just hate to not have access to y'all simply because I don't have the dreaded AOL.

Weezie: I knew what you meant, but I wanted to give you a hard time. If you wouldn't have been foreperson, I would not have thought any less of you, but I'm all the more pleased that you did. It's not easy being cheesey. And damn, if I'm not an easy read!!!!!

I think that any place can be amazing, it's all in how you look at it. Even places with tons and tons of rednnecks or the gangsta's gangsta in the ghetto. It's all about being appreciate something for what it's worth.

I also forgot to mention that we ate dinner at the Claudia Sanders Dinner House. It's where KFC all began.

I have been working my ass off at work. But I really do love it. It's nothing like when I was at Shandwick. I even manage to get myself out of a potentially bad situation. These two profs wrote this "editorial" that was way outdated and that everybody and their maw had already covered. They were hoping to get a prominent place in the Op Ed section. But when I talked to a few reporters, it was as I suspected -- a thanks but no thanks. So I immediately started trying to figure out other outlets, and I found them a place on a Sunday morning news show. Basically I told them that results would come, just in a different form. Go team!

BTW, sorry to talk so much about work. It's just I'm really passionate about it, and it's the first time I've found a professional home. At least for a while. If it bothers you, lemme know.

Craft supplies - yarn, contact paper, tiny plastic babies, that sort of thing.

My motivation is going out the window - Zach and I are IM'ing even though I'm supposed to be packing stuff for the post office and taking photos of stuff for eBay.

I started asking people about what I'll be needing for my computer purposes and it's getting kind of pricey. Chelsea pointed out that we can skip getting a landline 'cause we'll have cell phones, so we might as well get RoadRunner - but that would mean getting cable, so we could just get something else that would somehow mean internet access and TV on the computers and at that point she was halfway through a choc raspberry truffle martini (which looks like it should come with an eyeball in it) and I was halfway through my second lychee martini and I don't remember the rest.

you discovered it before i got to tell you... yes AOL Instant Messenger, Netscape Instant Messenger, Earthlink Instant Messenger (and possibly more that i don't know about) are all the same thing. They have some sort of partnership thing goin' on.... SO, angie, AIM is also free... if you get earthlink you'll have the earthlink version, if not, you can download it off the netscape site, or use the online version that's all the same.

ICQ and yahoo instant messenger are different though. i used to have all three, but i dropped the yahoo one. my AIM name is rocknrollupma. (don't laugh). my icq # is on my home computer... (but i think shelly and zach are the only ones who use ICQ, and you both have my info on that.
i am a girl nerd. i am proud of it. i'm not as bad as i could be...look at my co-workers, dude.

speaking of nerds.... angie, i think that's a good sign of him liking you, yes. but i don't think that's solely a nerd boy way of showing it. and also, by the way... loving people isn't's beautiful.

i never thought i'd see the day where someone said, "KY was amazing." just goes to show what we take for granted.

a gift for you... (click here)

Verrrrry early this morning, Mike and I discovered that yes indeedy, I can use Netscape Instant Messenger and he can use AOL Instant Messenger and we can tell each other how falling over exhausted we are.

I am upgrading stuff on the computer and it is making me gnash my teeth.

Ummm, Steph, what's King Cake?

most or all of the demo should be posted online by this time next week. Hard copies might take a little bit longer.

I like this pale yellow.
I have been craving King Cake all week. Luckily my parent's are coming to visit in a few days and have brought two! for me. Well, one will be brought to work as a goodwill gesture. Oh, so yesterday my supervisor comes up to me and says "we have a travel budget this year - any place you'd like to go?" So I wrote a proposal about going to a picture editor's workshop in Maine this summer (the same place I wanted to go work for last summer but didn't get the job - oh, well) and I feel like they're dangling a carrot and my proposal might not get approved but if it did - wow! That would be so so rad.
Angie - what an amazing trip. I'm glad the concert was so great. And, man, you did like one million things.
Zach - very cool CD.

Monday, January 28, 2002

Angie: As I stated, we can regard it as "your fault" or "you deserve the credit." I figured that if I admitted I'd been asked and turned it down 'cause I was scared, you'd whup my butt and I think I'm more scared of that than being the forePERSON, excuse me, I do not pee standing up. Yes, in the end it was my choice. Perhaps I should rephrase and say "I find Angie's faith in me inspiring." Better?

Zach, according to the Netscape 6 help function, the Instant Messenger for Netscape shares with AOL Instant Messenger, so theoretically anyway we should be able to IM. I don't bother with ICQ 'cause I don't own a computer...yet.

ok, Angie. Next time you go to to update, hit the "view web page" link in the black bar right under the posting space. If that doesn't take you to, then I have no idea whats going on.

I think you have to download AIM to be signed up there. ICQ is fine (and actually my preference) but no one seems to have it. And, to tell the truth, file transfers are tons easier with AIM.

Anyone interested in seeing the cover of the Dirty Version's demo should click here.
The drawing was done by our English mate, Gavin Jones and the designering was done by your's truly.

At least that is what my sign on name is. I'm just using AOL temporarily until I decide on an ISP. Maybe we should all sign up for a free chat thing like Yahoo or ICQ. Thoughts?

A few things before I talk about my trip.
Zach: I tried going to that blog link, but the page could not be found.
Upma: sorry your b-day sucked; I hope the days following were much better.
Stephanie: your Iron Chef party sounded sooooooooooooo lively.
Mike: good luck on the band.
Shelly: glad you're back.
Weezie: how the hell is it MY fault that YOU were the foreman????????

One boy question: I am assuming that if a nerd boy that you've gone out with several times asks you about your heritage, culture and family that he really likes you? Last week I got questions about Chinese horoscopes, Chinese New Year, Sun Tzu and Lao Tzu.

Ok. The trip. Was AMAZING. We went through all of Kentucky -- from the eastern to western sides. Even made it to southern Ohio. Checked out the Louisville Slugger Museum, Churchill Downs, drove past several horse farms, a covered bridge, Underground Railroad Museum, "My Old Kentucky Home", Makers Mark Distillery, ate at Skyline Chilli (famous Ohio chain that everyone raves about -- their chilli is different because 1. they put nutmeg in it and 2. they serve it over spaghetti). The green, rolling hills were beautiful. And it was cool to see all of these houses built on the lower side of the hills, making the towns look bigger than what they were.

The Down from the Mountain concert (which was what brought us there) was incredible. The only bad thing was that Alison Kraus had larengitis, and for some reason Emmylou didn't have all that big of a part. But Patty Loveless was amazing. Did you know that she is from E. KY, and both her dad and grandfather were coal miners. Anyways I need to check out the Fairfield Four from TN. It consists of five black men (so not sure where the four comes from) who sing in harmony. They all wore overalls with black suit jackets. The lead singer, a very large black man, would sing and say, "Have a little church with me."

I know this sounds silly, but I love black people. Seriously. They have such the passion for life, living up every moment and telling everyone about it along the way.

Ok, maybe I love all people. At least the nice ones.

my AIM = ShellyKIlloggs
i have an icq number around here somewhere too if anyone uses that...

i hope so too. so far, 27 ain't so much fun.
here's a story on the fire i saw:

iron chef party sounded great!! yum yum yum yum

Upma - I hope your post-birthday week goes well.
Here's how the Iron Chef party turned out:
First, I decorated a yellow pepper like Chairman Kaga (drawing little black gloves and black cape). Four hours of cooking. Six courses. The Ginger Battle. We played Ginger Spice's solo CD. We ate the following: vegetarian spring rolls, deep fried, delicious. Ginger and chicken broth. Ginger curry with rice, eggs and a cucumber mint salad. Hollowed out red and yellow peppers filled with lemon ginger rice, with ginger spiced beef and green beans. For dessert, ginger snap cookies with tangerine mousse and freshly made whipped cream with sliced strawberries and ginger crepes with ice cream floats made with ginger ale. Whoa. My stomach didn't know what hit it. After dinner, Paul and Ted had a Galaga competition. (Paul had a higher score, Ted got to a higher level). Stephmo and I had haiku writing competition.
Here's one of mine:
ginger, spice of life
the root of my appetite
I will eat you up
And one of hers:
talk trash, eat ginger
all worries will fly away
a night with great friends
I ended up writing about 10 more haikus - one an ode to Paul's pants
purple velvet pants
are you the rock'n'roll chef?
purple velvet pants!
We declared all competitions a tie and everyone took home prizes. It was a great party.

I'm sorry I missed your birthday, Upma, but I'm glad you're safe.

Upma: WOW. And happy birthday.

Sunday, January 27, 2002

yesterday, i had to go to virginia beach (which i'm very angry with myself about, because i kinda let my mom kinda force me into this situation... basically this girl that’s only a couple years older than myself was having her 10th anniversary party and invited me... why i agreed to go, i don’t know, but i will never do that to myself again... i mean i will never say yes to an indian party like that (unless it’s a friends wedding or something) or i will never do something i don’t wanna do on my birthday).
i don't like to make a big deal about my birthday... the only person it's a big deal to (other than mom and dad) is myself. and it’s not like i even feel like it’s a “big deal,” but it's the one day of the year where i allow myself to be as selfish as i want. for the last few years, i've had grrreat birthdays, usually ending with a show (last year i saw the chapel hill cellist with a sideproject of his!).
this year i had to go to an indian party... which i never have fun at. i mean... those people are nice enough... but... in short... i'm mental. i am always the most socially awkward person at these things. the uncles and aunties (we call all the parents that out of respect... like mrs. and mr.), they're half/half for me... i like the simpler ones. they're usually more sophisticated. the flashy ones really bug me... they tend to be more shallow. BUT, there are a couple of flashy, sophisticated ones.... i like them the best. these days though... i don't know or remember everyone. i tend to just remember the ones i like and the ones i REALLY don't like. last night, there were a lot of the ones that i REALLY don't like... and one of the uncles totally looked like a 50's ganster in his suit... like a cross between someone out of the madonna/warren beatty dick tracy movie and a stereotypical scorscese italian mobster. i’ll spare you he painful details of my social awkardness at these functions...and this one in particualr, just suffice it to say, it was probably one of the most miserable birthday’s i’ve ever had. and i had to pretend the whole time that i was having the time of my life. i don’t think i did a very good job of that.
it’s my own fault though... i chose to let myself get forced into this, and i chose to have a bad attitude about it.
this morning as i was leaving my parents house to come back to greensboro, (i was SUPER ANXIOUS to leave) i had just driven off the driveway and was on the street (it’s a super long driveway) and i hear my mom call me back. *what??! arrrgh* i turn the car around, they are at the bottom of the driveway... “oh, your tire is fine.. it looked from a distance that it was low on air.” fine. i’m out.
later this morning, i’m driving along... i’ve been on the road for 45 minutes (it’s a 4.5 hour drive) and all of a sudden people are slowing down to a halt. i didn’t see what happened, but this truck was perpendicular to the road on the opposite lanes from me. we’re on a small four lane highway, divided by a grass median. it looked like the truck, an 18 wheeler, was driving in my direction. and the gasoline (or whatever) leaked across to our side of the highway and within a minute it was a big fire.
it was just like in the movies and i was only about 10-15 car lenghts away from it. i was slightly traumatized... i pulled out my cell phone to call 911, but i’m delinquent on my bill, so i got no service. (i think i’ve learned that lesson). there were enough other people there though (thank goodness)... the fire engines and rescue squad were there within 5 minutes. but, before they got there, some man comes towards the cars that are backed up and say “we gotta organize a way to get outta here... the woods are catching fire.” he was so calm about it. my heart was RACING... *what if the thing explodes?!* there was a place to turn around behind us, so we all reversed it and turned onto the other lanes. the whole highway was blocked off... so the people headed east were all stranded too. after i got the car on the other side, i stopped again to think about what to do next. while i was thinking, i tried to dig out the camera, but i didn’t have any film. then i realized that i forgot my wallet at my parents house, so i just decided to go back there.
on the way back to the parents house, i realize a couple things. first, if my mom hadn’t stopped me to see if i had enough air in my tire... that whole interaction took seconds... who knows what the situation could’ve been. i was seconds away from that truck. and secondly, i realized that no matter how crazy or miserable my mom might make me, she and my dad are still... well, they’re my mom and dad. and i love them. also... when you forget your wallet at your parents house, there’s a chance that you’ll get eggplant pakora’s for lunch. and get to take your leftover birthday cake home with you.

I hate this color.

Blog redesign plans coming along. How many of you have photos of yourself (or photos to represent yourself) that you can send me? I'm probably going to use one of the Blogger templates with some personal touches. I'll make up one or two and we can vote. It might be a few weeks though.

Saturday, January 26, 2002

i'm 27 years old. this was a sucky day

Mike, I am hopelessly out of the loop. AIM?

Purple PUrple PuRple PurPle PurpLe PurplE Purple

Friday, January 25, 2002

I had (or have, I guess) an IM account, but I never use it. Sorry. Maybe when I get a better machine.

Angie: Bond. James Bond. Connery. Sean Connery. I think I was getting too obscure there.

Mike, I just updated our copy of Netscape, and for instant messaging you come up as *. That be you? Zach, I see you there as *l.

The jury was hung. Mistrial. It's over, for me anyway. The defendant sagged over in his seat after the non-verdict was announced. It's not over for him, which has got to suck. Did I mention I was the foreperson? Very stressful and at least a few of the jurors thought I handled it well. Horrified by how much authority they were willing to give me. Incidentally, I blame Angie (or give her credit) for my willingness to be the foreperson.

Thursday, January 24, 2002

Angie, switch your bookmark to:

And that should fix the problem. If it doesn't you might have to take your computer to an exorcist.

Mike: Man those security guards sounded like asses. That is the worst!

Upma: my parents are all about guilt trips, too. My mom for example went off about how I needed to read the Bible every night and not to "forget God." Of course I fussed right back: my mom is the CONVERT, and I am constantly having to answer her questions about holy days, confession, blah, blah, blah. Then I went off into the "everyone has their own sense of spirituality" tangent. And I told her that if she even thought about going into that crap again, that I'd hang up on her.

Weezie: Like Connery? Huh? The worst is when people score 75 freakin' points on one turn. 75!!!!!!!!!!!! At that point I knew I was screwed so I started using words directed at him: goon and fat. Not that he is either, but it was just my funny passive aggression coming out.

I've been looking at

It's rainy and foggy and I have to fly out tonight. See you Monday.

Wednesday, January 23, 2002

ANGIE! Girrrrrrrrrl, once again we can bond like Connery. My sisters have been SPANKING me at Scrabble. The little one is diplomatic, but the 23 year old goes WWF on me - with full rights, 'cause girl graduated from high school barely able to spell but whups my butt by 100 -150 points every time.

Steph, wish I could be there. I'd go for mint or ginger - much as I love the pomegranate wildcard, I think that's a bit on the unfairly tough side.

Upma, sadly I can relate too. That is so one of the reasons why I'm not planning on having kids.

Which leads me up to my dear darling friend in Portland, who has just informed me that she's pregnant. Shelly, I'm putting off Seattle by about a week. She hasn't come straight out and said it, but she's kind of scared and wants someone to be with her. I'm trying not to go into the um, excuse me, birth control? 'Cause I knew she was living with a fellow (but it wasn't serious) and he was moving out to go back to his hometown elsewhere in Oregon. All she's said is that he's...supportive. And she's alone.

Back to jury duty tomorrow! I think we're going to be in deliberation forEVER.

and you're looking at ?

my mother is driving my crazy. i don't wanna go to their house this weekend. and forget that... i can't imagine spending 3 or 4 days with her in philly. why do mother's have to drive their daughter's crazy? this is why i don't want kids. i don't ever want to treat anyone like my mother treats me... and i don't ever want anyone... especially my own kid... to think about me or treat me the way i think about and treat my mother. you know... the catholics aren't the only ones with all the guilty feelings about everything... other people do too. and it's brought upon by their smother-pants parents who also happen to be very religious and all family values.... i need a punching bag.

Ok, maybe I am a color blind dork but I have not seen the changes in color. Everything is just gray!!!!

Steph: we opened a Central Market about 6 months or so ago. I love that place! but there isn't a cafe like the one in Austin unfortunately, but they do have a very yummy Crazy Cuban sandwich that I enjoy. Man I wish I could come to your Iron Chef party. Sounds like such fun!

Been getting ready for KY. I'll be gone from Thurs. to late Sun. night.

Last night Bob came over. He is so laid back that he could give my cousin Greg a run for his money. He brutally kicked my ass in Scrabble by 100 points. 100 points!!!!!! In my defense I told him that he sucked monkey balls. I also gave him his b-day present -- a book called "Eat Your Way Across America" -- it lists cafes and dives across the U.S. and signed the card from his dog.

mmmm POMEGRANITES!!!! those are my absolute favoritest! but, they're not in season? do pomegranites grow all year 'round in austin? strike 4 for not picking austin.
strike 1 is the people i miss out on. strike 2 is that i've seen WAY more hype and hollerins about SXSW this year-- the year i am SO not able to go. (i know i won't be missing too much... in terms of learning things/seeing people talk... but all those fantastic docs and shorts!!! so sad.) strike 3-- they have iron chef parties.

today my horoscope said that i am responsible for changing the world. i freaked out, because i've been trying to tell myself that i am NOT responsible for changing the world. i ask a friend if i've been wrong in telling myself so. he says that i can change the world by eating thai food... based on chaos theory. i love my friend. i call another friend to have thai food with me for lunch... he is going to laugh at me when i tell him why we need to have thai food for lunch.
then it hits me... this script that gavin and i have been stuck on/avoiding/too "busy" for... the solution is apparent. chaos theory. it's totally the answer.

The goldenrod is nice.
Weezie - I have two friends who did Teach for America the last few years. Would you like their email addresses? For application writing advice?
My butt is dragging today. Last night I worked late, then went to a lecture on Perspectives of Religion, then caught a later, free screening on The Thin Man (plus a short by Buster Keaton). It was a great night, but then someone's out sick today, so I'm covering their meetings, and I really want to crawl back into bed.
Here's the invite to the Iron Chef party this weekend - you're all invited:

If memory serves me correctly.... it's time for the Iron Chef Challenge...starring

Paul R. - known for his French style of cooking and penchant for Willie Wonka Candy
Kristin H. - known for her ownership of a Kitchen Aid and having a "grown-up" refrigerator

The face-off will be this Saturday starting at 5pm in the kitchen of Mr. R.
The secret ingredient will be one of the following...

Will it be MINT? - used in everything from jellies to tea to garnishing your plate. Just how fresh do we want our breath to be?
or will it be GINGER? - it looks like a knobby hobbit's cane, but not in these capable chef's hands
or perhaps it will be LEMON... jewel of the Mediterranean, pucker up friends...
or perhaps, the secret ingredient will be POMEGRANATE... ooh, a wild card

At the same time as the cook-off there will be an intergalactic challenge between
Ted "I got to level 32 until they turned the power off" M.
Paul "it's my game system and I've been practicing for weeks" R.

Also possible events include: a skit by the Stephs, fabulous prizes for the winners, and a watching of the Sat. night Iron Chef episode on the Food Network

Now for the responsibilities/who is bringing what:
Steph F. - provider of the secret ingredient and all other thematic necessities (prizes!!!!)
Steph Mo. - charm, good taste, and savoir faire
Paul - kitchen host, staple food buying
Kristin - challenger, staple food buying and plate/dish/cookware lending
Ted - je ne sais quoi

In case anyone would like to start the smack talking now, please feel free to email your competitor. Let the champions emerge!

Your chairwoman,

I can't wait!

Tuesday, January 22, 2002

Let's compromise and call it gold. This color is my favorite so far.

Two jobs opened up on campus. I'd be happy to have either. Finger crossed.

Shelly, Angie, Steph, I am starting to freak out about my TFA application. I've rewritten both my essay and letter of intent, which I will post in a day or so. I need to send it off in the next three weeks. I am only mildly terrified.

Mike, don't knock yourself out. My SEA-IND ticket is roundtrip, so I'll probably be back in Seattle in June, on my way home for a visit.

Zach, it was nice to hear from Grace. Perhaps you could have her select the color for the web page?

havin fun over there, z? i noticed the green earlier. the "orange" looks more yellow on my 'puter. anyway. it's no blue. (i'm not really making a fuss... i'm just pretending to give you a hard time). are you back yet?

it's gonna be 60-some here tomorrow. (what am i gonna miss most about the South? hmmmmmm). i guess yesterday was just weird... i'm not all teary-eyed/emotional anymore. good good good.

shelly, glad to hear from you! (i feel more bonded to you because we're both INFJ's). sounds like you've been keeping busy. good luck and congrats on the new job!

mike. if it wasn't gonna be totally shitty of me to take a vacation that soon into my new job, i'd totally go with you.

i have more new friends in philly. exciting stuff. and as usual (for me), they are all from different subcultures... so, i got the theatre kids, the punk kids, the indian girls, the possibly gay indian boy, and the old-school blacksburg indie-rockers.

Orange you glad I didn't change it back to pink?

We had the day off yesterday for MLK. I spent the morning reading the New York Times at the Flightpath Coffeeshop. Drinking a smoothie and eating a bagel with feta olive cream cheese (mmm, feta olive). Then since it was in the 60's and beautifully sunny, I went and walked two miles around the Town Lake hike and bike trail. Then cause, I felt like I was on a vacation, I went and got a seated chair massage cause my shoulder's been all wonkadoodle from the gym this week. Then since I was at Central Market (Angie - if they build one of these in Houston - you must go - it's the Rolls Royce of grocery stores at Honda prices), I bought some fresh flowers, and practically skipped home. It was such an Austin day.
I am currently a bit overwhelmed by how many different books I'm reading right now.
The Iron Chef book - fantastic - I'm a recent acolyte to the Food Network, despite not having cable. I'm even helping to host an Iron Chef party this Saturday. My best cooking friends, Kristin and Paul are competing. I'm suppose to come up with the secret ingrediant. I'm currently leaning towards ginger, mint or lemon. Something that works well in a main or side dish or dessert or beverage. Any other suggestions from the crowd? There will also be a Galaga competition going on at the same time. I'm the judge, in charge of buying prizes this week at Toy Joy (shelly - that's the place you and JT went in Austin that has the fabulous toys).
Also reading, The Two Towers. Never got through this as a kid - but I'm inspired by the movie to try and finish it. Very slow in the middle. I have higher hopes for The Return of the King.
The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay - the book club choice - usually having to read a certain amount of pages per week puts me back in school mode - procrastinating and picking up everything else to read first, but this one, I have to keep stopping myself from reading on and ahead so I can contribute without giving stuff away in our discussions.
Lenny Bruce is Dead - this is written by one of the This American Life NPR commentators. I've liked his short stories in the past - but this work - it seems like a less well done version of A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius. I hope to get it finished soon, cause I'm not enjoying it that much.
Emergence - Ted lent me this book. It's about how societies and structures form. I just learned about slime molds. Well, then I put the book down. Maybe I'll get back to it soon.

Monday, January 21, 2002

Here is a slightly edited excerpt from an email to Louise. I think it may be late enough at night that my crappy connection will work to let me post. Here's hopin'.

Let's see I'll try to start at the beginning of my
accidental disappearance which I believe is near the
last time I went out of town. With temp work, since I
don't have any paid vacation I have to scurry to
overbook myself before I leave and after I come back
so that I can make up the money I lost from not
working while I travel. This year was really tough
financially because of all the wedding travel I had to
do. After the most recent trip in November it was even
worse because I still hadn't caught up from being
stuck out of town unexpectedly in the middle of
September and business has been slower since then too.
So I was working double time especially since I knew
that I have two more weddings at the end of this year
(my sister and close cousin) and I wanted to build a
nest egg for those trips.

In the meantime I participated in a program where
artists decorate bras to be auctioned for breast
cancer research. There ended up being a show and my
venus doll that I built around the pink satin bra won
in the category of "Most Risque'." It wasn't supposed
to be risque' but, whatever. I was a little bit upset
by the process because I never saw my Venus de Mammo
in any of the displays or auctions, so I don't know
what they did with it since THAT was what I donated it

In December, I participated in a group show called
Restart. It was an artist run show in alternative
space that runs like a party for two nights. Friday is
performance art night, Saturday is DJ night. It was a
lot of fun. There was a little intrest expressed in my
paintings, both fairly small figurative numbers, but
no potential buyers in sight, though a good amount of
the stuff in the show DID sell, one even to a gallery.
The intrest in my works was mostly limited to a
creepy stalkerish guy who already knew where I lived
and emailed me a bunch of times allegedly about buying
one of the paintings but actually about getting a
date. I didn't sell the painting to him. On the whole
it was a positive experience and I met a lot of
interesting people and "networked" a lot of contacts.

I submitted some proposals for murals at a new Gilda's
club in my neighborhood. Gilda's club is a nonprofit
started by Gilda Radner. They build clubhouses for
people with cancer and their families and friends. All
of the clubs have at least one entryway mural with
Gilda in it. Some of the clubs, including eventually
the Seattle one, are full of murals throughout. I
submitted ideas for two areas. I should find out soon
whether either or both were chosen.
The woman in charge of it was really nice. It turns
out she's an art therapist. So I made a separate
appointment to pick her brain for future "when I grow up" type plans.

From some contacts with the art show and Jacob's work,
a painting was commissioned from me. I'm working on
that now. The concept of making money off of art is
still a new one to me. I'm really excited about it.

Through one of my jobs at an art school I meet fashion
design students. I've had a running debate with a few
of them as to why they always design clothes and draw
people much taller than most people are. The answer is
always that it looks more elegant that way. I feel
that this is stupid and part of the reason that women
can't buy clothing off the rack. Because anyone who
knows anything about proportions knows that if you
design something three-fourths and try proportion it to
make it fit four-fifths, it will never work. I assume
that this works similarly in clothing size dimensions
as well and when they are cutting the patterns down to
normal people sizes you wind up with pants that fit no
woman's body. So anyway I've been trying to rally a
cause among the students (most of whom are NOT 5'8'
120 lbs.) to make clothing for short people (like me)
or more broadly, fashionable clothing for REAL people.
I seem to have made my point with one similarly shaped
designer who is tired of spending hundreds on making
the clothes for the annual fashion show only to wind
up with outfits she could never wear. So I'm going to
be a model in a fashion show in March. I'm about six
inches shorter than the other models and six to ten
years older. It should be fun.
I also got a sewing machine which I plan to use to further my cause. JT, here comes a run for your money.

And on the job front, I seem to have gotten one. I
have reservations about it. It starts soon part time
to be full time at the beginning of March. I'm nervous
about having to be at the same place at the same time
every day for the first time in two years. Other than
that I don't want to talk about it too much just yet.
I'll provide details after I start. The money is where
I want it and that is my number one priority right now
given the econmoic state. So I'll leave it at that.

Anyway, it is good hearing from you via the blog and I'm sorry I've
been so absent. The longer I'd been silent, the more
overwhelming the post seemed to be. I hope I haven't
rambled on too embarassingly.
Incidently I'm an INFJ. Zach, I hope you feel better. I can relate to the crappy days. Upma and Weezie, you'll do just fine where ever you are. JT, I wish I were in Paris too. and the only problem with macs, weezie, is that they don't play well with PCs hence my long blogging lapse. au revoire. I love you all.


Weezie and Upma: you ladies are going to kick asses and take names. Trust me on that one. It takes a lot of balls to get up and move, and (that's not to say that this will happen to either of you but . . . ) even if you get off the plane with an uneasy feeling and turn right back around, at least you know you did it. I hope that was deemed encouraging.

Weezie: I love you regardless -- gibbering mess and all.

My veggie lasagna was awesome: spinach, mushrooms, yellow squash. Weezie, I never even considered eggplant but maybe next time! Eggplant is one of those things I hated as a kid but really enjoy now. Kinda like fish and avacodos.

I don't wanna go to work tomorrow. Or the rest of this week. It's going to be hell, so either you'll read my bitching or think that I'm trapped under something heavy.

After spending almost an hour mucking around on the Southwest Airlines website trying to figure out cheap fares, I spent five minutes on the phone, got info on a flight not only leaving at a decent hour, but $30 cheaper than the lowest fare on the website. And I can't get it to appear on the website no matter what configuration I type in. Best of all, Chelsea could get a flight from Vegas to Chicago, where I'd be changing planes, and we could be on the same flight to Indianapolis and arrive at 7:50 pm. Gargh. She needs to get her flight out of HI settled first, but I'm getting ANTSY. I want to get the tickets settled ASAP.

I fly HON-PDX on Feb 25th, then go PDX-SEA on the 8th or 9th of March, then SEA-IND on March 12th. Got in touch with Shelly. Looking forward to hanging with her. Nervous nervous nervous.

i like veggie lazaGna with spinach. yum yum yum. i love eggplant too.

when is louise going to seattle? when will louise be in bloominton? when is louise leaving hawaii?

i don't know... i have been getting teary-eyed all day long... when i think about certain people in town that i'm gonna miss. and i'm getting all sentimental and crap. it SUCKS. i'm supposed to be tough. and i'm trying to be tough. and i'm trying to be the most positive person about this change in my life. i mean... if i wanna live all over the world... moving from gso to philly ain't nothing. you know? anyway.

my horoscope was funny today. it told me that i need to spill he beans to the person i've been obsessing over for months. i wish i could. unfortunately, i've ruined one too many great friendships because of my open feelings and big mouth. so, this one stays a secret for a little while longer. i only ever talk about it with two other people anyway. s'cool. i like it better like that... i feel like i opened up a bit too much in greensboro sometimes... i get paranoid that people know me/things about me more than i would like. i mean... not people on my favoritests list, of course (which totally includes all of you)... anyway... i think i'm being a total aquarius right now.

mike. moss is boss. i love kevin. shawn/sean/shaun doesn't suck. (how's he spell his name, i never saw the button). but dude. moss IS boss. and whichever one of those boys is the drummer, totally rules. i hope they liked the maginot line too.

i think i can decipher grace's message... i spoke baby a long time ago. it says: johnny depp on 21 jump street is hhhot, i love uncle zach.

yeah. i love unlce zach too. how's the car?

Angie, the key to my veggie lasagna is lots of eggplant. Slice it about 1/2" thick, salt and let sit for ten minutes. Squeeze out as much water as possible, dice, and saute. And lots of mushrooms - preferably portobella, but the buttons work fine if you saute them with the eggplant. And of course I would love to see you in Houston, although the intensive training they have outlines will probably leave me a gibbering mess on the weekends.

Mike, if I go to Seattle (and I probably will, as my plane ticket will be $45 cheaper that way, and the train ticket from Portland to Seattle is $23, so it's *practical*) it will most likely be between the 9th and 13th (will fly out on either 12th or 13th).

Hey everybody. Grace sends a message and here it is:

nb h b g vc 2:55 PM 1/21/02jumh n yn6t yn mm

I'm not sure what she means.

Weezie, actually August in Houston is worst than July for some reason. At least that is my humble opinion. And I'm of the opinion that if you expect it to be outta-your-mind-hotter-than-hot, then it's not quite so bad. Lots of places in Houston have covered parking. It's also nice in the early mornings. When will you find out about TFA? You know that I would love to have you down here. . . . .

I'm going to try to make a veggie lasagna today for the first time. Wish me luck!

I talked to Chelsea today (the woman I'm moving to Bloomington with...and don't even ask how many people have gotten the wrong idea about that), and we're figuring out airline tickets and stuff and it's starting to really really hit me that I'm going to miss home LOTS. I'm getting icky and misty over stuff like driving home at night and noticing the moonlight on the ocean. I'm getting a roundtrip ticket to Indianapolis from either Portland or Seattle, so I'm pretty sure I'll be flying back home in June. If I get into TFA, I'll spend July in Houston. JULY. I had better be in a dorm with air conditioning!

Angie, I was salivating over the iBook to begin with, so it didn't take much to convince myself to get one (although that won't be until the end of the summer). I'll check out PC Magazine, though, just to be sensible.

Mike, yeeeeeeee gads I would love to join you for spring in London, but after I make it to Indiana, I'm going to be beyond broke-ass. Say hello to my beloved city for me...and if you are feeling magnanimous, send me a box of Sainsbury's Kenya tea.

Where is Shelly, incidentally? Trying to get in touch with her...

Sunday, January 20, 2002

Ok, I was in a middle of a post and got booted. What the fuck??????????

Let's see if I can re-create this:

Weezie, sounds like you made a decision. If not, check out PC Magazine. They do monthly reviews on desktops, laptops, etc. in every category imaginable, including the budget one. Basically the consumer report of PC's and such.

Weekend has gone by way too quickly. Fri. was the KPFT board mtg in which there was plenty of name calling and finger pointing. Sat. went to the mini-White House exhibit which wasn't what I expected. Then we came back and Bob made fondue that made my tummy smile and we watched Remember the Titans which was soooooo good. Today. Skipped out on Mass to lounge around. Then went to a zydeco bar and two blues bars with my friend Sheryl.

my weekend has been great. my friend mark came down and rocked the house with his band. the Common Cold totally rocked the house too... if you get to see them live, you really ought to. and they were super super nice guys. from boston. mike, you ever seen 'em?
yeah. well, so i'm glad that mark came down, and his band-mates were all super nice to me too. i feel loved. and i love right back. i'm even more stoked and motivated now to get their video done. i feel kinda bad about taking so long to get it started... but, i also really want to do it right. anyway...

louise. buy straight from apple, and get the educational discount.

Saturday, January 19, 2002

Upma, that answers my question nicely! Seeing as I am pretty well not gonna be doing engineering work, I'll go for an iBook. I need basic word processing and internet access, plus artsy fartsy stuff, so that will be perfect. And what the heck, a new one. I say that so flippantly for someone who just cleaned out her bank account for a plane ticket.

Zach, how goes the vomitade? More specifically, the black bean and Veganaise flavor?

there is much debate on whether the PC/IBM compatibles or the Apple/Macintoshes are more superior. as one who works with both types of computers, i say neither is superior to the other. in my opinion, a computer is a tool like any other... you use whichever one will fit the job. so, now i ask: Louise, what will you be using your new laptop for?
basically, if you're going to do internet & word processing, anything will do (although at that point i would suggest the ibook... and i would suggest getting a used one, not more than two years old). the macintoshes are more user friendly for people who don't know/want to know/want to mess with "computer stuff."
if you plan on doing art projects/graphics/video with your new computer, i would suggest a new ibook. (although, if you are going to do video, i would want a G4 model, not a G3... and i'm not sure that the ibooks come in G4's yet... i don't remember. will answer that question).
if you are going to be doing more scientific/mathematics/engineering/computer science stuff, i suggest looking into anyone of the numerous PC type computers. my knowlegde on these types of computers has fallen to the wayside, but if you go to,, or you can probably do most of your research/comparisons there.
hope that helps. if you have more questions about the ibooks, imacs, G3's, or G4's... ask away!

Friday, January 18, 2002

Hey, do any of y'all have opinions on laptop computers? Looks like I'll be wanting one soon. I like the idea of the iBook but would also like to field opinions from others. And for the record, Zach, I happen to like the sleek silver case, not the chubby cutesy color flavored ones.

Oh, Mike, pardon my ignorance - instant messenger as in AOL? I have Yahoo (*).

When life hands you vomit, make vomitade.

Zachary, when life decides to vomit on your favorite shirt and then doesn't have the decency to pay the dry cleaning bill, it's time to read RuPaul's weblog.

Day 2 of being juror #9 and I am so glad I didn't go to law school. I just want to slap both the lawyers.

lunch was good.

Zach - my condolences as well. I hope today is better.

It ain't easy being green.

Thursday, January 17, 2002

I am simply in awe of how shitty the past 48 hours have been. Honestly, telling it sounds like I'm exaggerating. I'm not. Here's the play by play.

I get up today way too late again. My bank deposit still hasn't cleared, therefore, no lunch. My dad convinced me last night that I had the skills to fix my car myself. His faith in me was not misplaced I'm proud to say. All I had to do was remove the thermostat. Take out two bolts, pull the sonofabitch out and put the bolts back. I manage all of this smashingly. Except, in the process, I managed to break one of the bolts in half... STILL SCREWED IN. So now I have the busted thermostat out, but I can't get the housing sealed back on. So, it leaks. Which means Saturday's trip to Hickory should take about twice as long as normal, because I'll have to stop every twenty miles, wait twenty minutes for the radiator to cool and fill it with water, then repeat for about 90 miles. Butt-ass shit crack...

Tonight we had a show at College Hill with my old friend Chip's band, Port Huron Statement. Krystal calls and says she's too sick to sing. Being an insensitive bastard I only think about the fact that that leaves us with only five songs practiced and ready to go. Grumbling and pissed, Benji and I load up our stuff into Dave's truck. About a half a mile from the house and, maybe, two hundred yards from the bar, the back gate opens and two amp heads and one speak cabinet fly out in the middle of the intersection of Spring Garden and Tate St. I jump out. One of the heads, Krystal's, is busted to fuck. The other stuff, Benji's, looks beat up but okay. It probably won't work, but it looks okay.

The night is dark.

We finally get there, break the news and arrange for me to play through Chip's gear. Krystal is really sick. I didn't realize how sick when I was talking to her on the phone. She looks bad.

Port Huron Statement sets up. I hadn't seen them before, but I believe in my pal Chip. I knew he'd be doing good stuff. PHS is got a heavy Flaming Lips vibe going. They're really great, but they need a real in-house PA with a mixing board, which we didn't have. There sound was good in places, terrible in others. It all depended on where you stood. I felt terrible, like I failed them, because the place wasn't really digging it. Some kids were. I wish I could have booked the show at a better venue.

Midway through their set, Benji comes up behind me and whispers, "Krystal just threw up." I nod, because I could feel something like that was coming. Two songs later he's back. "Krystal went home. We're not playing." I have very little reaction to this. I'm glad she went home. I'm totally disappointed, but she shouldn't have been out. I knew that. A few songs later, Benji waves to me through the door. I head outside. He and Nathan are wondering if we couldn't do a few songs as a three piece. Of course, I'm all for it. Calmer head intervene as Andrew Dukek, our conscience, tells us not to. We should quit before shit gets worse. He's right.

So we load out after Port Huron Statement. In the middle of this, Kelly C comes in and tells me that she lost her job at Pace Publishing, which is terrible for her and crappy for me as it means no freelancing work, mostly likely.

At the end of everything, I'm standing there, talking to Chip, and out of nowhere, I start to faint. I have no idea what brought it on. My eyes went black and I start to wobble. Fortunately, I know I'm about to black out, so I grab a seat on the steps and try to catch my breath. I don't know I how I managed to not pass out, but I shook it off and rested. Now, finally, I'm home. All the gear, broken and whole, is downstairs. And I'm sitting up, stinking like cigaretter. Soon, I'm going to have to take a shower.

Maybe tomorrow will be better. But, if it's worse, I'll let you know.

i'm bored at work so here's a story:
i got a new bike yesterday. it's blue and the company that made it is Bullet. therefore i call it The Blue Bullet.
i was telling a co-worker about the blue bullet, and then another co-worker comes over and asks me, "is it sparkly? i think an upma-bike would have to be sparkly." that just makes me smile.
i told another friend this story (i told you i'm bored... i have NOTHING to do)... and he says that he agrees that an upma bike would "require sparkles and those dangly colorful streamers that hang from the ends of the handlebars too." ( i disagree with the streamer part... there's this girl in gso that has a bike like that and it just annoyes the bejeebus outta me!)
at any rate... that comment reminded me about this story:

when i was a kid in Lima, Ohio, i had an orange bike that was the best bike in the whole world!!! (i wish i still had it). it had a small wicker basket on the front of the bike. for some reason, i always needed to carry a pine-cone in my basket. and if any of the mean neighbor kids stole my pine cone, i had to bike over to the house in the neighborhood that had the best pine cones and pick up a new one off the ground and put it in my basket.
that bike has a tragic ending. the family went on vacation to Disneyworld, and i had just left my bike on the porch, cuz that's where i always kept it. while we were gone, one of the mean neighborhood kids thought it would be fun to steal my bike and trash it in the creek down the street. when i discovered what had happened to my precious orange bike, i was absolutely devestated. i still have no idea if that guy got in trouble for what he did or not, but i hope he has nightmares about it.

I'm an ESTJ

I went to the gym the other day, tried to get all about the weight machines, now I can't move my head back.
Work has been fun but stressful this week - a photo shoot everyday. This morning it was jam thumbprint cookies (I was at Target this morning buying a cooling rack, for the cooling rack shot) and an editor dressed as Friedrich the Great holding a horseshoe (yeah, I had to have the context of that explained to me, too. Some story about the king not getting a good enough horseshoe and breaking it at the blacksmith until he gets a good shoe, and then the King paying the blacksmith in silver, the blacksmith breaks the coin and ends up getting paid in gold - which doesn't make sense because isn't gold more malleable than silver, but whatever, that was this morning). Yesterday is was kids making paper mache pinatas, day before that, girls at basketball practice.
But the overtime has been nice. I may go to Alaska this summer. So I'm starting to save now.
I'm not sure what my kiersey temperment is, I may go check that out now.

i am an INFJ. i thought it would change from the last time i took this test (which was 8 months ago) but it didn't. interesting.

Zach, I believe it was W.C. Fields who said, "Don't cry over spilt milk, it may have been poisoned." Now with that said, might I add that black-eyed peas with Veganaise is almost as wrong as that gross-ass color you chose to piss me off with.

I bought two beautiful wool sweaters, three pairs of wool socks, and a pair of jeans yesterday. I bought a one-way ticket to Portland this morning. I'm going to Portland. I'm going to Portland. I'm going to Seattle. I'm going to Victoria. I'm going to see Erin. I'm going to see Shelly. I'm going to see Geoff. That's what I keep saying to myself. I haven't quite gotten to Indiana yet. Yeeg. That reminds me, I need to call G and see if I'm crashing on his couch or at a hostel.

It's 3 a.m., and I have insomnia. Not sure why. Just do. Not nervous or anxious or anything. Couldn't figure out what to do with myself other than go off on senseless rantings with the Lake Effect crew. I'll be paying for it tomorrow when I am trying to rewrite a media plan. *sigh*

Zach: A mummy? That, too, cracked me up. I love that we all have a way with words. Walking colostomy back. I feel like a mummy. Etc.

Mike: fuck everyone else who doesn't like your stuff. That's my philosophy.

Weezie: That is so sweet that you took the time out of your day to send me the care package. Seriously. I think people just take for granted the simple things (like Cajun Chick Ramen Noodles with a gumbo recipe on the back). Speaking of, not sure how many gumbos are made with noodles. Unless you're from some snooty place like Metaire (a suburb of N.O. where everyone thinks their shit doesn't stink; I mock them and pronounce it "Metry" because I can). That last jab was for Shelly and Stephanie's benefit.

Sat. I'm going with Bob to the George Bush Pres. Library in College Station for the mini-White House exhibit. Not because either of us like Bush but just because it's something different to do. I know it sounds silly but the nerd in me is excited.

Oh. Another tangent I've been meaning to go off on. My beloved radio station, KPFT, will be undergoing some major changes over the next few months. Basically they're (they being the wackos who basically just overtook the lil station) getting rid all of the music and replacing it with talk. They ousted several of the old staff (including the general manager who has been there since the 70's), and now they are scrambling. I'm going to a board meeting on Friday, and Angie may be starting a letter writing campaign to the Pacifica Board. The difficult part is that all of the old staff has basically given up. Apparently they have been under a gag order until just recently, and they are tired of fighting. But I will still write my letter to the national and local boards, and I hope to coax some of my social circle to voice themselves as well.

Wednesday, January 16, 2002

zach, i'm so sorry you had a crappy day!! i don't understand how you got ticketed in front of your house... ??? did anyone else get ticketed? anyway... tomorrow will be better.

louise, do you have to repeat to yourself that you are leaving town? maybe i'm a little sily/schitzoid/whatever... but, i find myself telling myself, "i'm moving to philly" several times an hour. different inflections too. and when that stops sounding like anything i change it to "i'm leaving greensboro." i think... well i told another friend of mine this... i think that the thing about it is that this is a kinda big thing and i did it all by myself and i'm just having a hard time comprehending it all now. what just happened?

my date with Rob Lowe tonight was superfantastalicious. did you know that Rob Lowe is from Dayton, Ohio? When I lived in Lima, Ohio (ages 4-15) i knew 2 of his cousins. one was super nice to me, the other was super snotty to me. the funniest thing is that the one who was super snotty to me was only a step-cousin ... and after some marriage fell apart, she was really no longer a cousin, but she kept saying that she was anyway. we were in middle school then. i hated middle school.

i'm mad about these factiods about A Beautiful Mind. i'm mad at Hollywood for not taking responsibility. the movie was good except for her old-makeup... but why on earth change those facts? the story essentially remains the same with those facts portayed as true or portrayed as fiction... i think the true story seems stronger to me. i wish Hollywood would get a clue.

What a crap-ass day. First, I sleep waaaay too late and wake up feeling like the Mummy. Then I eat a lunch of black-eyed peas with a dollup of Vegannaise in them (black-eyed peas and mayonnaise is a southern tradition), that make me feel all funny and sick. In most cases, Vegannaise actually kicks regular mayonnaise's ass, but not on the peas. I've learn my lesson. I had an job interview at 2. My car got ticketed, IN FRONT OF MY HOUSE, not once, but TWICE, sometime this morning. I take a wrong turn to my interview and never get there. About ten miles out of town (and in the wrong direction) my car starts smoking like Junior High and stalls out. So, now I'm trapped way the hell out of town waiting for Benji (bless him) to bring me some oil. He does. That's not the problem it seems. My thermostat is busted somehow. I finally get it home and dad tells me how to fix it myself, but its way too late to do anything tonight.

So, now I'm waiting for the icing on the cake. What will it be? Will I fall down the stairs? Will the sky fall on me?


Angie: The best part about that ramen is the recipe for making gumbo with it on the back.
Knowing that I can crack *you* up makes my day. Even more than Zach trying to piss me off long distance.

Mike, aside from having been savaged, how's the book going?

Upma, I'm so with you girl.

Louise: you crack me up.

All: Your crazy ass friend Weezie sent me Cajun Chicken flavored Ramen noodles and a cute coin purse. Cracked my ass up and made my night.

RE: A Beautiful Mind. A friend of mine told me that the writers totally put a positive spin on the plot. In actuality he is homosexual, and it was his lover, not his wife, that was so supportive. Also heard that he had at least one illigitimate child. But, it was still a damn good movie.

I am an INTJ.

Tuesday, January 15, 2002

so, i found out earlier this evening that i am for sure, for sure moving to philly. and it's starting to sink in some more. i'm pretty excited, i have to say. of course there are people here that i'm gonna miss terribly, but that's just life.

i just went to see A Beautiful Mind. i wanna go meet that guy. he is inspiration.

Walking colostomy bag is pretty damn good. Put a smile across my face ;)

Here's today's funny. Our dept. secretary forwarded a voice mail to me. I in turn tried to forward it to my co-worker Amanda. When forwarding I tried recording an intro, "Amanda, here is the message I was referring to. The reporter's deadline is Friday. . . ." so then I try to forward it but am completely unsuccessful. So I'm looking into the phone whining, "Why won't you work? What is wrong with you, etc." Little did I know it was still recording. In the end, Amanda got this professionally sounding voice mail followed by this crack daddy whining. It was our afternoon laugh of the day.

Today will be a long ass day. Left my apartment at 7:45 a.m. this morning, and will be returning after 9 since I have two work events. But I get comp time, so no complaints.

Almost two years ago, I got one of my co-workers into crocheting. He moved to the Big Island to live la vida boondocks, which gave him plenty of time to crochet and teach his boyfriend to crochet. Now they make hemp wallets, bags, and hats - he showed me a couple; nice work and the hats sell for $30 - $40 each. Ho leeeeeee crap.

Zach, just play around with it. Experiment. And piss me off all you want; it forces me to grow creatively with language.

Here's a blue. The more I look at this template set up, the more concerned I am that I won't know how to change much. This color change might be the best we get for a while.

Monday, January 14, 2002

i dunno zach.... you're steppin on some fine territory. you already got called a walking colostomy bag... i'm just sayin'.

so, if you're in the greensboro area on saturday, come to charlie's house and see my friend Mark bang his drums with his band The Maginot Line. and then come eat biscuits with us in the morn. it'll be jolly good fun.

So... we're keeping the pink, right?

Zach - I like the lighter blues and greens. I hate reading out reversed text on dark backgrounds.
I went to a painting party (as in watercolors not room walls) last night. I wasn't too happy with my finished piece. I thought it looked like a vase. The guy next to me asked if it was a scene from WWII.

John Zachary Mull, you walking colostomy bag. That color is so rank it doesn't even deserve to be called pink. Dammit, you know me too well.

Sunday, January 13, 2002

Zach, I really like blues, too. Seems to go easy on the eyes. My disclaimer: I have VERY LITTLE experience in web design and/or color coordination. And I might add that I trust your judgement, and that we, too, love you.

Whomever did not have home PC access got an old work computer, compliments of my boss. We have to of course turn it in should we change dept.'s or jobs, but still good stuff. Look forward to even more senseless rantings and e-mails from yours truly.

I am so proud of myself. I walked around the outdoor track at Rice twice this weekend (the equivelent of about 6 miles). I've just been feeling like such the fat ass lately, and I am hoping that this is the beginning of many more exercise efforts.

I took a culinary adventure today as well. I made BBQ pork ribs today for the first time, and I even risked serving it to one of my crushes. He sang my praises afterwards, and I was pretty pleased with how tender and juicy they came out.

i'm in love with blue. (my favorite is #003366-- but if you do go with something that dark, you'll have to change the text color to something light. i guess that was obvious).
are you doing the blog stuff on dreamweaver, go live!, or anything comparable? or straight HTML?

hunting for an apartment online is... hard.
i'm figuring that i should get my official offer tomorrow. going on that, my last day of work in gso will probably be jan 30th. and i'll go to philly the next week to look for a place. hopefully, i'll get to spend the next weekend in greensboro, but it's too far ahead to say. i want to spend every last possible moment here... it's starting to hit me how much i'm gonna miss all my friends. and certain charms of small-town life. although... i'm not as nervous anymore about moving to the city... i'm pretty excited about it, in fact.

oh... i have another sugesstion about the site. (i hope i'm not being overbearing). but, i wonder if you want to just make a seperate page for the list of archives? um... and why is there a question mark under each date?
how goes your job search?

hey, folks. I think with the group's approval, I'd like to change the look of the blog a touch. I feel comfortable enough with web stuff to change some things. I'll try to design a masthead and maybe some other graphics.

I changed the background color, because I was tired of looking at the grey. I'll change it every few days until, I finish with the masthead. Please, tell me if you see a color you like. Or you can make suggestions. About anything.

Check out the colors we can choose from here.

If you loved the grey, don't be afraid to say so. I don't want to do anything with out the group's approval. I chose pink to change it to first, because we've been talking about doing the cover of the next magazine in pink. And because I love you. And because I thought Louise would hate it.

Friday, January 11, 2002

I talked to Shelly the other day - I'm sure she'll reappear on the boards soon.
Weezie - my favorite philosophy professor from college is in Waking Life, towards the beginning, his specialty is existentialism, a Dr. Solomon, but that still didn't keep me from staying awake through the whole movie (hang my head in shame). I couldn't get into it.
I'm happy Ethan won as well. It's the first Survivor where the person I was pulling for actually pulled it off. There was lots of yelling and excitement at the party I was watching it during last night. Five girls screaming Ethan's name in joy.
So I now have tickets to the Elvis tribute show, it's billed as SINsational. I need to pick out a good dancing outfit.
My department manager was fired (unjustly) yesterday. It was all eggshells the rest of the day. Then another co-worker and I were in charge of taking down all his personal stuff in his office cause he wasn't allowed in the building. Very surreal. Not how I wanted to spend my afternoon. I tire of office politics.
I have a photo shoot tomorrow - girl measuring the circumferance of a tree - did you all know that every 1/4 inch represents six months of growth or some such equation.
Plan II - my major in college (sort of a Liberal Arts honors program) offers a class every spring that alumni can audit. So I'll be studying, starting next week, Perspectives on Religion (the year before it was Perspectives on Love, and the one before that was Perspectives on Truth). It's a panel of PhD's in English, Philosophy, Science, Law, etc. I can't wait. I think Ted wants to be snuck into a few of these.
I got back ridiculously cornball photos from our trip to Michigan. Lots of frolicking around in snow. Goofing at the local science museum. Me next to some bored looking reindeer.

Last night I went to happy hour with some former co-workers. This one girl, infamous for putting her foot in her mouth, was there, and I caught the tail end of her conversation. All I heard was, ". . . I got my nails done at that chinky place near the office." I whipped around to glare at her and interrupted, "Jamie, did the word 'CHINKY' just come out of your mouth?" She turned beet red and said, "Oh, Angie. I didn't mean it like that. I meant . . I meant . . . " I said, "You really should not use mean words like that." She says, "Oh but I know it's not a . . . not a . . . " I said, "Politically correct term?" She says, "Yeah, but . . . " I said, "So you really shouldn't be using it, should you?" And then at the end of the night when we were talking aboutour next gathering, I said, "And Jamie, no more 'Chinky shit' out of you." Do you think she got the point? Un-believable. And I don't even consider myself all that racially sensitive, but if she would have used the N word, I would have reacted the same.

And then. Man, last night must have been the night to get me going. I was on the phone with a friend. We were both tired and in not so great moods. He called me to tell me about some stuff with the radio station. And out of nowhere he said, "I really don't feel like talking on the phone right now." I said, "Well not everybody has to be an asshole. (I had said this before in a previous conversation but was being silly at the time)." He says, "I'm not trying to be an asshole. I'm just trying to be honest." I said, "Well let me be honest with you: I don't want to waste my time on the phone with DICKHEADS who don't want to talk to me." I think he was surprised because he kind of laughed and said ok. So I said, "Bye," and hung up.

Really, who has time to be bothered with that retarded bullshit? Carry your ass some where else.

Thursday, January 10, 2002

Got your reviews Mike. They look great. Thank you.

Job hunt has begun in ernest. So far no luck whatsoever. Kelly has promised to hook me up with her editor about some freelance writing for Pace Publishing. I hope that works out. I managed to stand her up tonight, not thinking about what I was doing. D'oh. I'm surprised my legs don't stop at the ankles I shoot myself in the foot so often. I was talking to a woman from another publisher in town today and somehow ended up breaking off what I know realize was a "sizing up" conversation. I'm a dolt.

If any of you know of any work in the Greensboro-High Point-WinstonSalem area, let a brother know. I'm nearly out of food and I can't think about how to get more until I figure out how to get rent money.

I wish I were in Paris. Maybe someday. Have fun JT. Tell em I said Bonjour.

I listened to the band's 8 track recording last night. At least, that has turned out well. I'm a little afraid my singing (which we haven't recorded yet) will screw it up. When I can post some tracks, I will.

Is Shelly still with us?

JT: Tho I know the divine holy trinity that is bread, cheese, and coffee, shirk not the pastries. I still get weak-kneed remembering the pate a choux with a puff of whipped cream and strawberries.

Steph: The movie is Waking Life. I wanna go see it again.

Weezie - what movie were you referring to? I think I missed that entry.
I went and saw A Beautiful Mind last night. That Russell Crowe, he has some acting chops.
I think I'm going to an Elvis tribute show this weekend at the Continental Club. The local Krispy Kreme has peanut butter and jelly doughnuts all this week in honor of his birthday.

i wish i was in paris. eating lots of bread n cheese.
i'm sick again. i think it's the 4th time in two months. i don't understand it... i hadn't been sick for two years before all this. i don't ever want to be sick again.

Wednesday, January 09, 2002


In Paris. stop
May never return. stop
Food = Chocolate, Cheese, Bread in any combination, then repeat. stop
Jet Lag has opposite effect on me. Stop
In last 48 hours have had 6 hours of sleep. I'm awake for the first time in 6 months. stop

Duuuude. Why does feeling like a woman cost so darn much? :) The irony is that the haircut I think of as punk pixie has already been written off as "holy shit you really look like a dyke now." Plus I think I've gotten to a stage where I'm willing to just let the pros do their job so that I don't need to think about how I look. Next up: personal shopper. Actually, that would be hand my friend who works at Banana Republic the gift card I got for Christmas and go get coffee while she assembles my new wardrobe.

Yesterday I had lunch before the movie, with a glass of iced tea, and then a tea latte (I do believe that's another funky Hong Kong invention), and took a bottle of Diet Pepsi Twist into the theater. I had to pee SO BAD halfway through the film, but I stayed. I want to see it again. And again. And again. I'll have to buy a DVD player just so I can watch it. Oh, I guess I'd have to get a TV to go with it. Naah, just a laptop with a DVD player in it. Anyway, I'm serious, go see it. Unless you are Zach and will have nothing nice to say afterwards.

Weezie, you are just doing things to make you feel like a woman. No shame in that game.I recently bought this 100 percent Halloween orange silk shirt that goes down to my knees with a slit that I wear with all black. It was an absolutely senseless purchase but it made me feel good.

Upma, yes, I am going to Louisville/Lexington at the end of the month. I didn't realize that there would be so much to do up there.

Yesterday I went to lunch with my pal Andrew at "This Is It" soul food. I had chicken and dumplings, rice and gravy, smothered cabbage, yams and cornbread. Needless to say I had little for dinner last night.

If you can believe this, I have absolutely nothing planned this weekend except for a b-day party on Fri. night. I'm sure I'll find something to do with my neurotic self!

Tuesday, January 08, 2002

AAaH! See "Waking Life" so that your head can hurt like mine. Like "Fight Club" on blotter acid.

Angie, I just crocheted a flower out of wool yarn and dyed it turquoise with Kool-Aid and a microwave oven. Very much in keeping with the haircut I got today - Heather was inspired by my home dye-job multi-purple and gave me shorter and spunkier and asymmetrical. Plus I had my eyebrows waxed to half their original size. Why I am going through all this professionally assisted aesthetic when I fully expect to be on the Navajo res in a few months?

angie. aren't you travelling east in a couple weeks?
you can come see me in my new philly home this summer. all of you can!

Weezie, you are so crafty. I wish I could be as cool as you are.

This weekend I went to a cool blues benefit called "These Shoes Were Made for Walking." Admission was $10 and a pair of shoes for the needy. I brought in about 12 pairs of old shoes. They raised like $1600, and I don't even know how many pairs of shoes they ended up with. The concert was really, really good, too. I went with Nathan the Cowboy and even convinced him to "step on my toes" for a few songs. There were so many of my blues friends there, too, whom I hadn't seen in a while. Good stuff.

This semester is going to be crazy for work. Jan. is MLK Day, Feb. is Black History Month and a big investment center opening, March is Women's Month, April is the March of Dimes Walk for America. Phew! I am going to need me a big, fat vacation this summer.

Monday, January 07, 2002

well folks. looks like i'll be in NC for approx. one more month. my mama said i need to buy snow boots. i'm really not thinking about it too much right now... cuz i'll just freak out. the less thinking, the better.

Zach, leave it to you to find the most poetic description of having a cold.

Steph, I keep meaning to learn to knit. I have a two-inch wide piece, two rows long, on a pair of needles. It took me three hours to get that far, and that was several months ago.

i hope that's it's settled this week. i'm.... confused. and scared. and overwhelmed.

Zach, I'm so sorry. Colds are awful. I'm snotty and flemmy and hacking and red-nosed and red-eyed and ready to be healthy again.
Weezie - congrats on your burgeoning crochet business. That's awesome. I wish I had such skills. I started knitting a scarf about a year ago (for a now defunct ex-boyfriend) - can't seem to get motivated to finally finish it.
Upma - what's the latest status on all things Philly?

Sunday, January 06, 2002

I've got a cold. I feel like I fell out of something's butt.

Saturday, January 05, 2002

I'm going to go over my application stuff with Sarah, who is pretty good with that kind of thing. I'm just not comfortable with the tone of the essay yet - she is bound to tell me it's because I'm bound by cultural restrictions which prevent me from tooting my own horn, and I'd better get over it quick, 'cause the traffic is pretty loud where I'm going. And she would be right. I really hate bringing up the stuff in the essay because I try to avoid the "I'm such a victim" mentality.

It's been a bit chilly in the mornings here. Whoooo! 65 degrees! :)

Angie, my mother wanted me to get a digital phone here on a family plan so she could get a lower rate on hers. I had to point out that it would mean everyone in Bloomington would have to call me long distance, even if I was next door. Plus I have no idea what coverage is like in New Mexico.

I've been on another crocheting binge. I made a cute little vintage-looking cap for a couple of friends, and one of them has people asking her where they can buy now I'm in business. Plus, on the Glitter discussion boards at, someone wanted to know how to make this Anna Kula flapper cap, which sells for $128.00. I could whip this out in an hour.

And then this headband, $84:

Even if they were charging in Canadian, this is just stupid. Who out there has this kind of money to drop on these things? If you know, give me their number, and I'll be rolling in clover.

Friday, January 04, 2002

i don't watch survivor, and i don't plan on starting anytime soon. however, i have a question for you Big S watchers... who's the guy with the curly hair? i see him in the commercials.

Weezie: awesome letter. I think it will be stronger with the numbers, as you suggest.

Zach: cool poster.

Wow, a year on lake effect. Pretty cool.

Stephanie: my sinues are acting up like a problem child, too.

I got home from work yesterday, and I had a message from my aunt. My parents decided to pop into town and wanted to meet for dinner. Can you believe that shit? What is worst is that they are leaving today after lunch, even though neither of them have work on Sat. What is all of that about?

I have been telling everyone I think that they are drug dealers sometimes. Not because they do things on a whim, but because of the things they decide to do on a whim. Like trading a perfectly good car for a new one (same model) with a huge note all within a matter of 15 minutes. Weird.

Oh, so they decide to change their cell phone plan. And they end up getting a third phone for me, because it would mean free minutes with my mom's, dad's and my phone. But I already have a cell phone. So my dad, who started the whole debacle, tells my mom that I need to decide what cell phone I want, because I look like a drug dealer with two cell phones and a pager (work issued). Who the hell gave me the second phone anyway????? Like I said, weird shit.

I have a softball game tonight, and it is going to be COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD.

Thursday, January 03, 2002

Like Upma said, it snowed last night. About 6 inches, which is a pretty good snowfall for this area. Snow is always fun here. Nearly everything closes down. Not quite as much as year's past though. This area has become more wealthy and become the home to more and more people from the North who insist on showing us bumpkins how a real American deals with a little snow. I'm always very impressed.

Last night, we drove in the snowstorm to Burlington. Burlington is about 25 minutes away. It took us an hour, but it was fun. Our friends Uwarria were playing at Stage 18. Opening for them was an amazing band from New Jersey called the Assistant. They ripped it up. Uwarria is a really great band too. Their gimmick is that they only do songs about environmental issues. So they have songs about the Outer Banks ecosystem and about South American Howler Monkeys. They do it all with a lot of humor though. "Jaguar" is a song about how much it would benefit the billions of species of the world if jaguars ate all the humans. Funny.

Today, we made fajitas and watched O Brother Where Art Thou and about seven episodes of Friends on DVD. Then we went sledding over at Lindley Elementary. They have the best possible hill for sledding. It's steep and long and at the bottom there is another little hill to launch up on. There were tons of families out, with little kids crashing into each other and just getting wrecked. Those kids were tough.

I made a flyer for our show on the 17th and I'm so pleased with it I'm posting it here.

Tomorrow more snow. And the Royal Tenenbuams opens. Whooo.

my boss DID shut it down. and i got two words: cabin fever. i already watched all the Sopranos episodes. i'm too restless to do anything productive... so it's the food channel tonight. unless anything else comes up. anyway... THIS is real winter weather. i like.

Weezie: I love your letter of intent. I'm at the gushing stage, so I'm not ready to offer suggestions yet. But I think it sounds wonderful.
Yesterday at work I got the travel bug - but more of a go different places and do different odd jobs for short stretches - like work on a research vessel helping scientists, and work in a national park one summer and take a group of kids, give them cameras and go on fun adventures together.
But today - back in my cube, with a runny nose, stuffed up sinuses and a sour disposition. Well, just a little sour.
One year, huh, happy anniversary everyone.

Wednesday, January 02, 2002

Upma: That is exactly what I did - decided at minute nine I didn't want to go home and be an office manager for a successful investment firm - tossed that job offer out the window and kept going. Though I would say that if you have the chance at a really awesome job that you would love...hrm.

Angie, Steph, I posted the EXTREMELY rough draft of my letter of intent at I just don't know what to do with it. Any suggestions are welcome, right down to spelling and grammar.

so... if one were tossing around in her head job vs 3 months on the road... you would say "ROAD, GIRL!"?

i didn't think it would actually snow. they predict it, it never comes. they predicted it, i was laughing at them. but... it's snowin, dude. and it is sliiiiick outside. i'm surprised that this little dusting of snow is so slick. BUT, i'm not surprised that this little dusting of snow is shutting everything down tomorrow. HA. one more thing to love about the South. my boss won't shut it down tomorrow though.

My New Year's Day was all about laying around the house. I was going to pack and clean...later, I guess.

Angie, I'm looking at leaving at the beginning of March, going through Portland, Seattle, and Victoria B.C. then on to B'ton. I'd stop more frequently, but frankly my budget is going to be stretched to the max, especially since I'm supposed to be finding a place to live and all that. Y'know, I think about how much money I've spent paying off my damn credit card, and I think, was all that worth that much? I'm still saying YES! Those three months rambling around the U.S. were priceless.

Upma: remember: an interview is not only for them to decide if you like them but also for you to decide if the people, place and work is a good fit for you.

Weezie: when do you plan on coming over? Chicago is amazing! It's my second most fav city in the world.

I had the best holiday. I love being around my friends and family (sometimes), but it was so nice to sit in my little apartment alone. Hell, if I wanted, I could stare at the wall and drool, and no one would bother me.

Here is a funny. My great friend Kyle bought me the autobiography of Harry Lee -- the Chinese American sheriff who runs Jefferson Parish (neighbors New Orleans). I believe that it was in the 80's that he had his officers stop people based on racial profiles ("driving while black"). I heard him speak at an Asian American leadership conference for youth, and I couldn't stand the man. But his biography should be interesting. I laughed long and hard after opening the gift.

Last night I made grilled chicken that was marinated in a white wine and lemon herb sauce, steamed Tuscan veggies and 4 cheese tortellini with a creamy tomato sauce. The marinade was too salty though. Everything was was good.

On Sun. night I saw "A Beautiful Mind" which was so good. I didn't know what to expect, and and all five of us gave it a thumbs up. I heard though that the writers strayed away from the true plot. Oh well.

I learned that Texas this year was second in capitol punshments. Okalahoma beat us out by one person. Hmmmmm. Wonder why that is.

Happy New Year everyone. (this post has a definite gluttonous theme)
My New Year's Eve was all about the eating.
Lobster soup, fresh spinach salad with spagetti squash and sundried tomatoes, wild mushroom risotto, roasted duck with greens and mashed potatoes, and finally blood orange sorbetto with fresh orange slices covered in champagne.
Any party would be anti-climatic after that.
So my New Year's Day was all about the sloth.
I spent four hours on my friend Paul's couch while he catered in junk food from the kitchen. It was like having a manservant. Friends Stephmo, Liz and I were wrapped up in blankets, watching the Twilight Zone marathon on the Sci-Fi channel and switching back and forth from the Food Network. We saw episodes on the making of ice cream, hot dogs, movie candy and soda pop. It was very nice. That night I had green beans for dinner I was so not hungry and then finished a book, watch some tv and was in bed by 10:30. It was hell getting up this morning. I sounded like a pterodactyl I was so cranky.
Goodbye vacation.

Tuesday, January 01, 2002

Upma, don't sweat your answers to the interview. As long as it wasn't along the lines of, "I'd fire all of them immediately" for every given situation. And I would so watch the Sopranos with you if it weren't for the several thousand miles I'd have to travel to get there.

Bloomington is "a few hours" away from Chicago - that's all I've been able to get out of my friends in Bloomington, and I am taking that as "We've never driven there." Bloomington is about an hour south of Indianapolis, and from the map, it looks like Chicago is another two or three hours. Me, I'd want to spend the weekend up there, maybe meeting up with my Milwaukee friends.

We estimate that there were about 40 people here two nights ago. It was quite a scene. So crowded that there was no place to sit in the living room or stand in the dining room or kitchen. People were sitting in the hallway.

Upma, we'd love to eat anything you make.

how about that.
i wanted to celebrate with my dear friends, but alas... the new trend seems to be that i get s-i-c-k on new years eve. it happened once in the late '90's. it happened for 2000. and again for 2002. i like the fact that 2002 is a palindrome.

angie/all- my 2nd interview was this past weekend... the first part was a quiz to see if i knew which cables connect to what (camera, dv deck, computer, external hard drives and an extra monitor), which i think i did well on... but then the second part ...i'm not so sure about, and it makes me have 2nd thoughts about the job. basically, the questions were "what would you do in this situation..." and i'm not sure i gave him the answers he wanted to hear. i guess we'll see.... but after tackling those questions... i feel like i might not want to do this job... organizing other people's lives/organization/projects. all i want to do right now (for a day-job) is edit. and i'm not sure if taking this job would help/hinder that goal. thought for me to ponder.

steph- i'm so glad that ted's family likes you... it means they know good people. i'm glad you enjoyed the snow too... eveyone should experience snow at least once in their lifetime... it really does have a magical quality to it.

weezie- do you know how far bloomington is to chicago?

oh yeah... i e.mailed JT a couple weeks ago to get address verification... he said that he's in DC for a bit...and then he's going to paris for a couple weeks and will be back in buffalo in late jan. The 20th, i think he said.

two nights ago, we had a pot-luck at zach's house... usually... there's about an average of about... 15-20 people at these things (would you agree zach?) but THIS potluck was crazy crowded... i guess with all the people that are in town for the holidays... it makes sense. it was fun... i wish i was feeling more sociable though... there were a few people that i wanted to meet, but just didn't have the energy to say "hi" to.

zachary- i bought a BUTT load of organic potatoes.... more than i can ever eat in a week... do you think i could make some potato soup or dish for you guys? will you eat it? what do you want... it'll be a couple days... i need to get healthy before i cook for anyone else.

well. happy new year! i rented the 2nd season of the sopranos... i wish i could invite some people to come watch with me... but i will not be responsible for getting anyone else sick.