Thursday, February 28, 2002

this job is putting me on the fast track to a nervous breakdown. kainui, i might have quit by the time you get here, then we'll have lots of time to hang out.

What I love about JT:

He does not apologize for being brilliant and creative. He makes his own skirts. He knows what poem I'm trying to find when I can only remember the first line. He knew what was beautiful in me before I did: and that one of his many gifts; to see the beauty around him and then tell us about it. Because he makes a blizzard in Buffalo sound like just the thing to be caught in. Because he reminds me that there will always be things unspeakably gorgeous and transcendent in this world.

Angie - what can I say, I love love love lists.
And as inspired by Shelly's more positive spin (not that I couldn't go on and on about pet peeves - stop tailgating me you huge trucks!)
Things I like:
--trash talking with Ted during dance lessons about who's on the correct tempo
--wearing red
--lying in bed, snacking and reading all afternoon
--good smelling shower stuff
--watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Survivor with groups of friends and making commentary
--Italian food/red wine
--my job
--spring in Austin
--unexpected presents (to give and to receive)
--covering my fridge with photos (this month's theme: people in wigs)
--after picking up some film, not even waiting to get home to look through the photos, but sitting in the parking lot of the photo place and going through the prints/slides/whatever
--the Scottish accent of my yoga teacher
--theme parties (big surprise there)
--being a part of this blog (awhhh)

things I love:
-- singing loudly, proudly, badly in my car with the windows rolled down and the music blaring, no matter who my passengers are.
-- Saturday mornings. waking up at your leisure. thinking to yourself, "do I want to go to the public library? to the CD store? walk around the outdoor track? do I want to read the paper? is it time to call my mom? ah, I have one more day of leisure before the work day starts.
-- friends where you can just be you. whether that be laughing till you cramp up or crying hysterically.
-- comfort food.
-- getting all passionate about random things.
-- having a really big laugh that makes people's heads turn or lips smile.
-- a really good shopping find.
-- giving and receiving care packages.
-- talking trash.
-- not being bound by time.
-- sharing a funny thought.
-- writing letters.
-- talking about nothing.
-- pretending to have a clue when I really don't know my head from my ass.
-- quiet time.

There are lots, lots, lots more. Hell, I could write a book.

Stephanie Friedman, what have you started??????

The show with Tristeza went well last night. We played well. Fifty something people showed. We had fun. Tristeza was great.

Wednesday, February 27, 2002

Pet peeves: people who constantly apologize for being themselves; e.g. apologizing for their opinions. Worse yet, friends who beat themselves up: "I'm so fat/unpretty/lame etc." because that is saying that I have horrible taste for hanging out with them and excuse me, my taste is *impeccable.* Other than that, I seem to be pretty easygoing. Oh, wait, overcooked vegetables. Actually, badly prepared food in general. And when I get all weepy at movies and airports and stuff, which is double annoying because it kind of relates to pet peeve number one.

Things I love: staying up too late, talking and laughing with Erin the way we used to when we lived together. Knowing that I might be around when the baby starts moving. Little signs of spring, like buds on the trees. Hot cocoa in the morning when it is 45 degrees outside. Oatmeal with bananas, raisins, brown sugar, cinnamon, and yogurt. Remembering my way around a city after being away for several months. Having hours and hours to spend wandering around in Powell's. Realising that I can actually understand some of the lyrics to Stereolab 'Lo Boob Oscillator': la lune est libre, je crois! The smell of the Aveda shampure that Mari gave me as a travel present. Being able to walk into a house in Portland and be at home immediately, toothbrush in the holder and everything. Getting nifty little presents in the mail, even when I'm far from home. The way my nails turn pink with hairdye after I shampoo. Freshly done laundry. Zachary sounding like a lunatic and then explaining the magic of Springsteen/Journey/Green Day. Angie getting all worked up. Shelly adding extra i's to skiing (and selling a painting!). Steph telling us about her latest fabulous party. Upma when she forgets to be overly self-concious and reveals just how awesome she is. Mike when he explains the Hip Tanaka concept album. Me when I can make Erin laugh so hard the baby must think s/he is in a washing machine. My nephew climbing into my lap while I type at the computer. My sisters kicking my ass at Scrabble. My brother deconstructing my latest recipe and explaining what works and what doesn't. My dad telling me stories about when he was a kid. My mother's cooking.

What's breaking my heart: knowing I won't see the family again until at least June.

Man, I could do these pet peeves all day long, but I promise this is the last one.

Why o why do people put the toilet paper on backwards? Clearly, CLEARLY, the preferable way to do it would be sheets hanging over, therefore facilitating easy of access and removal. My household, however, is a hanging under group. What the fuck? Why? I asked. They said, "what difference does it make?" This is some shit for two reasons. One, they always do it hanging under. Every single goddamn time. And, two, if it doesn't matter, then why won't you do it right? It only takes a second to orient the roll! Hanging under, aside from being totally counter-intuitive, also means that it most bathrooms you get a nice cold brush on your fingers from the wall.

Man, I sound like a lunatic.

Hmmmm. Pet peeves. I've got a lot, too, probably. A few of them:
-- when boy visitors leave the toilet seat up (I live alone, and my apartment is a girl apartment, so I appreciate it when boys are considerate of that fact)
-- when people use the last of the toilet paper and don't change it or they don't tell me about it
-- when people don't wash their hands after they use the bathroom
-- when I'm driving, trying to turn/merge, and the passenger moves their head in my way so that I can't see if someone is coming but so that they can (the whole passenger driving thing)
-- nosy ass people who purposely listen to your phone conversation and then add their two cents after you hang up. or even better, when they interrupt you in mid-conversation.
-- when people act like asses just because they can
-- uppity, snotty people

Man, I feel like a big, fat, neurotic asshole.

Shelly: your trip sounds awesome.

yesterday --- was reading an article from the Baton Rouge Advocate about the influx of Louisianians to Texas, only the reporter focused on Dallas and nowhere else. I got pissed and had an e-mail exchange with him. Shelly was unfortunate enough to get a copy of the correspondence. Man, I am just so damn passionate at times.

Tuesday, February 26, 2002

skiiing was so much fun that i decided to give it extra iii's--;... skiiiing. i fell in some interesting positions that probably would have hurt less if i did more yoga. but the last run i got from the top to the bottom without stopping or falling until the VERY bottom where people were clustered waiting for the lift. i panicked and veered into the net because i didn't think i could steer between them. it took three men to untagle me from the net, but i was still pretty pleased with myself. the land was pretty and snow was surprisingly NOT very COLD. i burrowed down in the snow on the sunny top of one hill in the afternoon and took a nap.
art is going well though i'm "working" too much to get as much done as i want. the new job still sort of sucks but i still hope it will get better. i don't think they're going to let me have the schedule i want and they promised me a bus pass and renegged. keep your fingers crossed for me. so far i'm not transitioning well back into the daily grind after two years of semi-employed bliss. my old hell job comes back to haunt me by trying to collect money for 3 months cobra insurance saying that they "have no record" of me cancelling it. so basically they're trying to bully like $1000 bucks out of me over their mistake. but i shan't complain, i'm in a good mood.
tonight we had the photo shoot for the fashion show which was frenzied but fun. the theme is " fashion plates and flying saucers." pictures are one f the things i'll need to post. also a few designers asked me to model for them in upcoming photo shoots for their portfolios. i feel like a *STAR*.
i don't feel like talking about my pet peeves as i have a great many of them. some of the models started getting testy tonight when a few of the camera's broke down and the line started getting really long and overschedule and it was pretty hot. so we started playing a game of listing things we like. i like a lot of things too.

i want to respond to the gripes list, but my head hurts from playing scrabble with zach and angie. they beat me.

i was a little overwhelmed again today, i came home for lunch and almost started crying cuz i kept thinking "what have i done?!" but, after lunch i went to a cool indie rock coffeeshop that's just down the street from me. and that made me happy. and then work seemed ok. OH, i did meet a really cool girl today that i work with. there's just not too many people there... there's the big boss man (who is going to sxsw this year... he's gonna be on a panel, lucky bastard). then the legal/funds lady (i like her a lot). and then there's a guy who did my job (not very well) till i got here, and then this girl i met today who does.... i dunno. she does something with kids though...

dammit i'm tired.

Pet peeves: Stephanie M hit my number one, I think. Purposely misspelled words drive me bonkers. But, honestly, I think I hate purposely misspelled names even more. I knew a Daryel, a Rian and a MaKenzy. Grrrrr.

Since I proof a lot of writing, I have come to despise dashes, exclaimation points, semi-colons and elipses. No one has any idea how to use them.

My roommates (especially Benji) tend to stop the microwave before it finishes, then leave the last 5 seconds on there for the next person.

My friend at work collected his friends Pet Peeves. Mine's included below.

Stephanie M.: Words spelled incorrectly on purpose (ex: Krispy Kreme, Kwikwash).
Karen P: When the cashier puts your coins ON TOP OF the bills.
Sujay P: When people say “Yeah, no . . .”
Kristin H: I can’t stand it when people have stinky feet but pretend they don’t (and then get offended when it’s pointed out).
Lyndol D: When somebody eats a huge bowl of salad and it takes them forever to eat and they’re not even full. They just eat and eat and don’t get anywhere.
Rachel: When the last person to use the shower leaves the shower switch up in the shower position.
Emily S: When people say they don’t like a certain food but have never tried it.
Ben H: When you make a phone call to a business and get an automated menu and the first option isn’t #1 (“Press . . . 6 now”).
Ann: I hate it when people tell me to relax.
Stephanie F (me).: When people ask stupid questions at question and answer sessions (such as “What makes you tick?”); also two part questions at Q&A sessions (ex. I have a two part question, the first part is...). Also when people try to talk to you when you're using the bathroom stall at work. And when adults talk baby talk to other adults at work.
Sarah H: When people start to explain something complicated and then say “You know . . .” but you don’t really know.
Julie B: When people use a sponge and then don’t ring it out, so the next time you use it it’s all cold and wet and gross.
Paul R: When people use the word “y’all” in an e-mail.
Emily R: When people make noise when they eat quiet foods--like when someone’s eating mashed potatoes and you can hear it across the room. Also when people refuse to “see what else is on” during commercials.
Ted M: 1) I am aesthetically allergic to bellowers and screechers in public places and 2) the existence of strip malls pains me . . . also 3) any mention of the greatness of Ayn Rand or her books, or her philosophy (get a clue: they blow).
Kelly S: Toothpaste spots on the bathroom mirror. And people who can’t talk and work at the same time--people who have to stop what they’re doing when they talk to you--especially annoying if you’re waiting for them to finish what they’re doing so you can start your stuff.
Katelijne L: People who smack their food, smack, smack, smack. Also people who drive at the same pace as the story they’re telling.
Jarred P: People who make lists.

Oh yeah, she did all those things. Then she did a twirl and doffed her top hat at me.

Actually, the damn cat just slinked around, probably planning her next escape. No one offered to fedd her, so her interest in us was nil.

tuuuuucckerrrrrrrr!!!!!! i miss her.
did she love you and kiss you and tell you you're her friend?

mike, 4am might not be appreciated so much. but anything earlier than 11pm is cool.

Monday, February 25, 2002

Hey, Upma, I saw your cat tonight.

well, i dunno. work was slightly overwhelming today as first days usually are with "here is this and that," yet at the same time, mundane. because "this" and "that" was tedium. i'm sure as i get more settled in, it won't feel so overwhleming... i hope it won't feel like a drag. a lot of the tasks are stuff i had to do as a TA in the equipment room at grad school. (ick). nevertheless, i'm keeping an open mind. oh, the other thing i don't like (but will get used to) are my hours... 11a-7p. not my style, jack.

i had pizza for the first time in the city of brotherly love tonight. and now i'm craaaaving chocolate because Seinfeld was the one about the twix at the car dealership/jerry's insiders deal/kramer's quest to run down the gas tank. i think i have hot chocolate somewhere.

Sunday, February 24, 2002

louise. i need an address for you (whenever you can get me one) to where i can mail something to you.

tomorrow's my first day of work. i don't get to go in till 11. that means i don't get home till 7. i'm not so sure i like these hours... i hope that's just for tomorrow. i guess i'll find out...

i played a game of literati (aka scrabble) online last night... it was fun! it was a yahoo! game... if any of you ever wanna play... we ought to.

I leave tomorrow for Portland and my internet access will be sketchy for at least the next three weeks. When you don't see me posting, it's not because I don't miss y'all.

If I've got the address right, Mike will also be the proud owner of trial subscriptions to about 15 magazines, trial-size pet medications, a few shampoo samples, and three major credit cards.

Mike: I love getting mail, too. In fact, I have this one friend whom I only correspond with via letters. It's actually pretty amazing, and it's a whole lot more personal than e-mail. Although I've been known to send many a tangent e-mail in my day. My most favorite thing in the world are care packages. This is such a girl thing, but about a year ago one of my closest friends got this "friendship ball" in the shape of a Christmas ornament. You fill it with stuff and send it back and forth. We've exchanged anything from candy to socks to bracelets to lipstick to nail polish to frilly frou frou soap.

Speaking of eBay, did you hear about that guy who sold some weeble figurine set (or some crap like that)? He owned and operated this factory, had rave reviews from buyers then one day he collected I forgot how much money and then just disappeared. It was on the front page of the Wall Street Journal on Fri. I wish I remembered how much money. It was quite a bit, so now the FBI is stepping in. Even his wife was dumbfounded. He's been missing for like a month now.

This weather has been absolutely beautiful, and I've been trying to take advantage of it. I was all feeling sorry for myself yesterday afternoon (which I don't do well at all) then decided fuck it, I'm going walk 3.5 miles. So I did. I can't believe I am admitting how neurotic I am to y'all right about now. Anyways today I had a softball game. I'm actually on two teams now. One that is very good, and one that is very, very bad (as in Bad News Bears like bad). It's all good though.

Saturday, February 23, 2002

Upma, that sounds awesome. By the way, I had a blast helping you finish your crossword puzzle the other day.

So Mike, are you trying to suggest that we should be sending you mail? Because I can start filling out every information/free offer card that I run across with your name and address. Surely you'd be able to find a use for a free trial size box of tampons?

Angie, it sucks to be an American right now, doesn't it? We get to be the "innocence lost" generation.

mike, what did you get in the mail that made your day?

today i went to my brothers' senior recital. he is a senior at William and Mary. have i mentioned before what a genius he is? the reason i don't hate him/the reason we get along is because i'm in love with his genius. he is hands down the best musician i have ever known. and, i know a lot of musicians. he did 9 pieces today, and the title of his show was "Shawn's not-so-Serious Senior Recital." he made this event so fun, that even people who despise classical music could enjoy this show. (but why you would despise classical music...?). he played his violin, he played the piano, and he had 14 of his closest friends help him out with the whole brew-ha-ha. i think my dad phrased it best when he said that shawn makes his violin talk. it's true. i wish i could express to you in words how proud of him i am, my heart just fills with joy for him. this little dude is going to be as famous as the three tenors and as well respected as zubin mehta... van cliburn... yo yo ma... itzack perlman... take your pick. i'm glad that he's mine.

Friday, February 22, 2002

Upma: I can assure you that not all of my relatives are that silly and down to earth.

All: I'm sad about the murder of Wall Street Journal reporter Danny Pearl. Man, he was just trying to do his job (which did not include bombing villages or anything like that). And I feel so badly for his 7-month pregnant wife. Damn, that's a load of shit.

Thursday, February 21, 2002

i got my new PA driver's lisense today. i had to wait for 2 hours in that god awful room. BUT, i got an option of photos... she took more than one and asked me which one i wanted. sweet. so i'm somewhat not appalled by my photo.
then i got mail from louise... a sheet of personal ads. the one tick-marked in pink:
Travelling filmmkaer seeks man for leading role.
Indie rock boys preferred, poets welcome. No actors.

I LOVE IT. it's totally got my name on it.

so, it looks like vacation is over. tomorrow morning i go to VA for the weekend, and then i start work on monday. so sad. but, it'll be good to get a paycheck, i got some financial catchin up to do. oh i can't wait to start saving for various jet set trips! yay.

i was writing an e to someone today, and misspelled a word (surprise), whereupon i realized that i wanna start spelling like the brits. colour. behaviour. etc. brits are cool.

angie, i think your cousins sound funny! i wish my family wasn't so... tight. *sigh*.
steph, lemme know!

Shelly: so excited for you and your ski trip. Where to? Canada?

LSU is playing UH in baseball this weekend for a series. Not sure if I ever mentioned this but when I was playing competitively as a kid, I took a few hitting clinics from the now current coach, Smoke Leval. Pretty cool, huh? At the time I think he was batting coach.

My office held a conveniently rescheduled b-day party (after my horrid event) for me. They took me to lunch, we had cake and they got me flowers and some UH paraphanalia (sp). Love these guys.

Also, my two dumb ass cousins who I do a lot of trashing talkin' with . . . one lives in SF, the other in NJ. SF is in NJ right now, and they are both unemployed and just fucking around. They sent me a belated e-card. It was the funniest thing b/c in the name section they wrote "dumb asses" so the subject line said, "you have an e-card from dumb asses." The card was hilarious. It's this woman in the bathroom, and she's yelling, "Toilet paper! Toilet paper!" then it says, "Your b-day wasn't the only thing we forgot."

Work. Super busy.
Upma - did I tell you I'll be in Philly for one day in April? With my fam, not sure what we're doing yet. I'll be asking you for touristy advice once you're more settled in. Going to a photo lecture tonight by Lucien Perkins - Pulitzer Prize winning photographer. Should be inspiring and humbling.

Just submitted my application to Teach for America. The past two days have been very, very college and I am glad they are over. Now I just clean and pack and leave.

going skiig for the first time ever. maybe. i'll definitely see snow for the first time in any sory of accumulation. did that make any sense? i'm exhausted. 15 hour days only doo a body good if you love what you're doing. i don't. i hope my weekend (which starts now) is different.
there is so much going on with ya'll. i have to put out a generalized good luck and congratulations cause i accidently fell asleep last night when i "sat down for a minute" before packing. i'm getting picked up in less than two hours and i'm not sure what to pack for snow, but i'm pretty sure i don't own it.
good luck, congratulations, and love!

Wednesday, February 20, 2002

Work event: over. A-the-hell-men to all.

Upma: cool digs.

My fav new saying of the week: "I'm up to my ass in elbows" -- from a Fox 26 TV reporter

today was day 7. it doesn't feel like i've been here that long.
i bought new jeans and a jean jacket from the gap. i got my new cell, (which is only free for the NE corridor, so i think Mike and JT are the only one's from this list that i gave the # too. if you REALLY want it, lemme know). i tried to get my new drivers lisense, i'll have to try again tomorrow. i tried taking a tour at city hall, but got way too confused, so i just didn't try anymore. i found The Body Shop in another fancy pants shopping center right next to city hall. and i got a dunkin donut which was YUM! and i went to see a movie called ABCD which stands for American Born Confused Desi. it was a'ight. it's supposed to be better than American Desi, which i haven't seen yet... but even so, i already agree that ABCD was probably better. the one i write is gonna be more challenging to the audience (more challenging to the indian american audience)
i'm sorry to offend the other Southerners here, but i have always liked Dunkin Donuts better than Krispy Kreme. please don't think less of me. i'm still the same person, i promise.
i posted a pic on my website which shows the view i have from one of my bedroom windows... go to the film section of the site to see my list of favorite movies of '01.

oh yeah.. and about your question, mike, about how big is philly... i'm gonna answer that question for you when i have one. you probably want a better answer than "it's somewhat big."

i'm watching skeleton... it looks way fun. i wanna try.

grrrrrrrrrr..... i just heard a Shin's song on a TV commercial. curses. currrses!!

All of our MP3s will be posted soon on They have a very drawn out approval process. We're still waiting.

Tuesday, February 19, 2002

Hey, it looks like the Dirty Version will be opening for Tristeza in Chapel Hill next Wednesday. For those of you who don't speak indierock, this equals good news.

I think I read like 200 pages of my book today. I should get paid for this.

we should be called the food lovers blog. mmmm, i want some green beans now.
i'm BEAT. this city life... ok.... well, this exploring my neighborhood deal... it's wearing me out!
today. i rescued my bike, i went to my office, typed & printed up a note for my apt. manager, opened up a bank account, wandered down to South St., found a cool record store, found a cool whole foods grocery store right across the street from a commercial grocery store (i didn't go inside the commercial one yet, but i'll probably have to, to at least get cat food at some point). then i went exploring west of my apt, (as opposed to east as i've been doing thus far). i think i like center city east better. but, i'm gonna explore more wither tomorrow or thursday (depending on when it doesn't rain). i like my new city.

Zachary Mull: I've been meaning to send you a note on your misconception about how the state of Louisiana missed the cafeteria train. I'll have you know that the Picadilly chain was founded in Baton Rouge, and there are several cafeterias around. Off the top of my head, Edward's (a local place), Picadilly and Morrison's. You also forgot to mention the broc rice casserole, smothered cabbage, fried okra, greens (I've never known greens to lack some sort of meat, so your vegan friends must have had a helluvatime). I also love the yumm garlic bread. And they have like 10 different kinds of jello on tap. Even a meat lover like me orders the "veggie plate" or the fried chick or the roast beef or the chick and dumplings or the turkey and dressing (don't forget the brown gravy!!!!).

In Texas we have Luby's which is fairly decent.

My big event tomorrow, followed by the Dylan concert with my friend Mike. What a way to top off the night.

i rescued my bike! and bike lock!

Monday, February 18, 2002

My second replacement monitor died over the weekend. I'm back to the brain tumor headache inducing first replacement.

Sorry about the red.

steph- that’s an awesome dream, thanks for sharing!

more adventures in philly:
this morning i woke up, tackled the bathroom, then walked 13 blocks east to rescue my bike. no luck. (i think i have to buy a wire cutter for $36 tomorrow so i can get the blue bullet back).
after accepting defeat, i walked back west on Market Street. i found 2 rite-aids, a CVS, and a freakin MALL. the mall contains a Big K.Mart, JC Penny’s, Strawbridges, a Gap., and a bunch of other stores i have never heard of. i also found a Sally’s Beauty Supply.
i was also told about a place called The Market At Reading Terminal. wow. you don’t KNOW... they have produce stores, a spice store, mmmmm! lots of eatery stands (including a thai one, and a country cookin one), coffee shops, bakeries.... and it’s not that big. i was so wide-eyed walking through that place, it was fun.

tomorrow, buy the wire cutters, rescue the bike, pay a visit to the landlords office and tell them not to jerk me around or i go to the better business bureau, and maybe drive around with a co-worker so she can show me some places i need. (like a grocery store). oh and open my bank account. and visit the drivers lisense office. and buy a new bike lock (not combo, but key).

my new friend joe is the sweetest person in philly. i’m sure of it.

Oh - I forgot to tell you guys about the cinematic dream I had last night. It involved one guy and two girls. All the scenes between the guy and girl 1 were in b&w, with the other girl 2, in color. It played out the relationship with each couple, all hinging on one moment when he has to chose one or the other (think Sliding Doors), but he ends up in both stories, which I dreamed to the end, with him cheating on whichever girl he started with. But the dreams kept cutting into each other, switching back between the two stories, b&w to color, time going all jumble. It was hella cool.

Happy Birthday Angie! I hope your sinus infection is gone super soon Upma - you are having an adventure. You rock. Also - you can order Target stuff online if there isn't one nearby you. Angie - have you ever been to the Broken Spoke on any of your Austin trips? We took Ted's parents there Saturday so they could have a "Texas" experience - two-stepping, waltzing, cotton-eyed joeing. I think they had a blast. Yesterday we took them to this yummy restaurant East Side Cafe - they have a garden in the back and specialize in vegetarian fare. I had the artichoke carrot manicotti, vegetable gumbo and broccoli with lemon butter. We have to shoot paper airplanes tomorrow and I haven't had time to make any. Yikes.

Angie, rest assured that my version of "I'm not eating" = I had two bowls of tomato lentil soup, some brown rice, a bag of chips, some chocolate cookies, and about ten cups of tea. 'Cause, you know, that was's more like, I'm not as focused on food right now because I am getting nerrrrrvous about stuff and that interferes with my appetite.

Happy Birthday AJ!

Sunday, February 17, 2002

angie joe. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
i think the nearest target is in jersey.
so, tonight was great fun. after finishing up with the windows, i made some phone calls to people i know up here... and people i know through others. one guy, joe, returned my call.... he's been nothing but sweet since i got in touch... the whole blacksburg crew is always soooo nice. it's totally like... if someone can vouch for you, you're good. so since butch can always vouch for me... i'm so in anywhere he is. and he's got connections everywhere. (hey... butch is actually in boston now).
so. joe took me for a walk in my neighborhood, (which i kinda guessed, but had it confirmed today, is the gayborhood). we had dinner at an irish pub... good black bean burger... he bought, and when i got that surprised/grateful look, he said, "you gotta get used to people being nice to you around here." so far, it's true.
then we came back to my place, got my bike, we rode to his place, (which is in a quaint neighborhood), and then went to the movies. it was super cold to ride bikes (although it was warmer riding than walking)... and it wasn't as scary as i thought it would be. however... dummy me, forgot the combination to my bike lock, so it's still at the theatre. i'm gonna mess with it tomorrow... i hope i figure it out. and i hope no one steals my bike till then.
hanging out with nice people is fun. unfortunately for me, my new friend is moving to barcelona in about 6 weeks to be with his girlfriend who just moved there. i'm beat.

zach. you're trippin. it hurts my eyes.

Weez: why are you not eating? Did I miss something?

Upma: I think that if you went back to that restaurant, your Punjabi would improve with each visit. And I think that those old people would love to help you with it. At least that is how it was in San Francisco with me and my dry cleaning lady.

So Sat. was my 26th b-day, and I just wasn't all that excited about it. Maybe it has something to do with that damn sinus infection or maybe the work stress. Who knows? Shannon and Darren came in town, and they got me a yummy cookie cake and let me pick out a CD: I chose the first volume of the Committments soundtrack.
Tonight Nathan the cowboy called and took me to dinner.

Bob the Builder seems to have bit the dust. He was supposed to have gone on a road trip to Florida and called me when he got back. It's almost been three weeks. I don't get it. He all just so happen to buy a book by Lao Tzu (most prominent ancient Chinese philosopher next to Confucious) after intiating a conversation with me about his ideas. And he intiated the talk (which boys, in general, don't do for shits and giggles). But now he's nowhere to be found. *sigh* I guess that I'm going to have to do something about this next week, because damn it, I want my book on the Chinese zodiac back.

I think I'm going to eat a piece of my cookie cake and paint my toenails while listening to Aretha Franklin.

Target has a store locater on their website. All my sympathy on the grime - loved your description of it! I stayed in an unwashed punk home in Oakland several years back, and the bathroom...I don't know how you can get a bathtub that dirty. Especially without using it.

I'm leaving in a week. I am drinking lots of tea and not eating. But my hair looks great!

Upma, practice makes perfect. Keep going to the restaurant, just for the Punjabi. You rule, woman.

Saturday, February 16, 2002

we got to philadelphia on thursday, unloaded the truck and started to settle me in. i guess the apartment isn’t as tiny as i had remembered... it’s actually an ok size. i’m still not in love with it, however, since i’ve gotten more settled in, it’s grown on me a little bit. we’ll see.
my ultra-worried parents were most concerned about “where is she going to park her car?!” i kept saying that i would figure it out, and learn where to park w/o getting in trouble. not good enough for my parents (who never listen to me anyway), so my dad rented me a parking space right across the street. i’m good to go till april 1. after that, i’m on my own. (i refuse to pay that much for a parking space... i’ll figure it out).
on my first night here the fire alarm went off, so we all had to file out of the building. (it was like being in the dorms again). apparently, this happens a few times a month. not looking forward to that. this time it was because someone’s dryer had started smoking.
also, the elevator is crappy and breaks down a lot. in fact, during the fire fiasco a fireman got stuck in the elevator. (one of the kids said “if THAT doesn’t make them change the elevator, i don’t know what will. another few kids said, “don’t ever get into that elevator without your cell phone!”) i guess i need to find out who to call if i get stuck in the elevator. i plan on being a regular user of the stairs (i’m on the 8th floor). since i can’t afford a gym yet, it’s cool. i need all the exercise i can get. philly is the fattest city in the states...
also on the first night, my parents and i went to an indian restaurant down the street. my friend rené recommended it to us, so since we didn’t know where else to go (and on stupid cupid day, no less), we went to that place. as soon as we sat down, my dad says “this is a sikh’s restaurant.” then grandpa came to give us water and started chattin with my mom and dad... i tried to answer all the questions in punjabi, but i just can’t keep up. so, after dinner i went to go pay up front (dinner was my treat) and since the dudes were busy, grandma came to help me out. of course grandma speaks in punjabi to me... i can’t count that high in punjabi. she tells me the total, and since i don’t want to look stupid i just start taking bills out of my wallet and handing them to her till she stops taking them. THEN, she says to me that since i’m new in town she’s not charging me, but only my parents. so i go back to the table and ask how much “attai” is in punjabi... which i still haven’t figured out... i was gonna leave the huge tip on the table, but my parents told me to hand it to her, and of course she refused. that was really really sweet. i’m a little afraid to go back there, cuz of my lack of communication skills in punjabi, but i also totally want to go back there because they were so nice.
the next day we went to another Sikh owned restaurant on the other side of the same street, which was much more posh (the other restaurant was totally simple home cooked vegetarian meals... a little bland to suit the yankee palate but nothing a little chutney and achar won’t fix). anyway, this other restaurant was more posh, but only my brother (who came to town for an audition for the Henry Mancini something or another), and i noticed how dirty the dishes and glasses were. gross... and the food wasn’t the greatest... but the menu was great. i’m gonna give that place another chance sometime... the man was nice.

this apartment was fiiiiilllllthy when we got here. you don’t know.... i mean it was dirtier than ten L.A. gutter/crust punks . i think i cleaned off about 200 years of grime off my windows... ew! and my bathroom.... don’t let me get started on how nasty the tub is. i’m still not done... but i couldn’t do it all in one day.

now, i need to find a grocery store and a target. i think there might not be a target in philly. that scares me. i know there’s a grocery store.. i mean a REAL grocery store, (there are a couple of convenience stores right in front of me), but i know there’s a real one somewhere around here... i just gotta figure out where. i need to walk around the neighborhood and figure out what i have near me, other than indian food. oh, we went to a burrito place yesterday too... it was ok.

tonight was the first night in 3.5 years that i have walked outside at night by myself and not given it a second thought. it felt nice to walk down the street, take care of business and not feel scared.

as soon as i figure out how to take still pics with my new fancy pants camera, i'll post some.

in case you missed it earlier, let me emphasize the “stupid cupid day.” see... i usually call it “crapentines,” but that seems so... 7th grade. i needed something to carry me through the next 20 or so years... and i thought up “stupid cupid day.” i think i’m a genius for thinking that one up. nobody better burst my bubble and tell me that i wasn’t the first one who thought it up either.

zach. i miss you. as soon as i got here on thursday, i thought to myself, “can i go back home now? i think i made a mistake.” but like i said earlier, since my parents left and i’ve gotten more settled in today (i only have a couple more boxes to go), i feel more “at home” here. i think... i hope that by the time i start work next week, i’ll be good to go. actually, i feel pretty ok now.
i’m glad you didn’t steal any girlscout cookies... i would be pretty super mad at you if you did.

angie, thanks for your thoughtful e. you’re awesome.

JT. you are beautiful. a delayed “welcome home!” i’m glad you had a good time in paris Being a feminist is a most humanitarian way of life and thought. there is no such thing as betrayal in being a feminist. i thank you.

We had a Dirty Version rock show last night. These are the people who came:

Manamid, the other band (3)
Gina, somebody and somebody else, aka Manamid's wives and girlfriends (3)
Rick Spencer (1)
Francis, Myra, Myra's Boyfriend and that girl with the fuzzy hair they hang out with (4)

Which isn't an overwhelming turnout, I'm sure you'll agree. But, we played really well and got paid more than we ever have before ($35). And it was fun. We finally nailed the beginning of our newest song. I made some funny jokes. Scott of Manamid assisted, with playful heckling. Me: Manamid is playing next to give you the other half of your money's worth. Scott: Ha! More like two-thirds!

We were competing against a cool show in town (Summer Hymns and Choose Your Own Adventure) and a lame show in Winston-Salem (the new Dead Kennedys) and some dude's party.


This morning a spontaneous posse assembled to go to K&W Cafeteria. These things may not exist where you are. Basically, its the elderly's version of a high school cafe, except the food is mostly better.

I suspect that these things don't exist where you are, because the style is heavily Southern. Even Louisiana has likely missed out on the Cafeteria scene, because, guys, I don't know if you know this or not, but LA, and New Orleans, in particular, are the South, but the South as it exists in Bizarro-land. You guys probably have PoBoys shops and crawfish bazaars, where we have cafs. There is nary a hint of hoodoo at the K&W.

What you get there are homecookin' classics. Mashed potatos, green beans, fried chicken, liver and onions, cooked apples, seven layer salad, cornbread and, praise Jesus, sweet tea. A vegetable plate costs about four bucks, five with tea. The clientele is almost exclusively blue-hairs. The elderly love cafeteria food with a great and insatiable passion. My guess is this the kind of food they would make for themselves everyday if their age didn't make it such a chore.

What makes this lunch worth mentioning is that, while my parents love to go the K&W in Hickory, my Greensboro friends are a little afraid of the place. K&W is not very vegan friendly, as you might imagine. So, I was surprised when a big group of people wanted to go there this morning. The ringleader, I suspect, was Chris Newsom. Newsom dresses like a dirt punk, but is really a good ol' boy in pupil stage. Here's a guy who knows some shit about living. Today he said, "Dude, I don't know if I'm ready to live in a place that doesn't have bullet holes in the stop signs." Preaching to the choir, Reverend Chris.

Outside, Girl Scouts were selling cookies. Had I been a total scumbag, I could have stolen about six boxes of cookies. Girl Scouts, being young and trusting, had decided to store their cookies behind them in an alley. I thought about it for a half a second and decided that would be an irredeemably low thing to do.


Listening to Steely Dan. "They got a name for the winners in the world. I want a name when I lose."

Friday, February 15, 2002

I really don't care for v-day either, but every year people send me cards, and it really makes my day. This year I got five via snail mail and two e-cards, all from my awesome friends.

Two more working days until my big event, and man have I been working it. I had a photo shoot and video shoot all on Wed. night. The photographer (yes, he was a professional still photographer) took pics that were out of focus, cut out some people, and in one he took the pic from behind a glass wall, and you could see his reflection. I barely could pick two decent shots out of two rolls of film.

Then, the guy who did the video editing sucks. He sent over a tape that had video but no audio. My boss was livid and said that it would be like us sending out a press release with no words.

Did I mention the WASP asshole professor who acts like you should kowtow to him any time you even think about mentioning his name. You can just imagine what it's like to talk to the mo fo. His first name should give you an indication of what he's like: Richardson. Sorry bastard. Just to give you an idea: we were taking pics of him, and the photog was trying to get him to smile. I was coaxing him by saying, "Smile Rich. I know you've got a bag full of them. Just think back to your wedding day . . . " He looks at me and says, "Angie, I don't know that I smiled that much at my wedding."

On a good note . . . Shannon and Darren are driving in this weekend. I'm cooking lunch for them -- south LA style. I'm making a roast that is marinading in red wine, garlic, Tony's and soy sauce; slap your mama white beans; yum corn on the cob and Texas toast garlic bread.

Today is cleaning day. I have thrown out three huge garbage bags of random detritus already. My brother and I have debated over who actually owns the comic book collection - either way, it stays in the storage room, so whatever. When I start sneezing too hard from all the dust, I go through the Lake Effect archives and my old journals (yesterday I went through my other blog archive and all my old email). I am trying to find a story to use for my TFA essay. So far, no story, but I have been reminded of all the reasons I adore this group of people. And that 2000 was such a sucky year for me otherwise.

It's later now, and I have pulled some stuff from the Lake Effect archives, and hopefully I will have something by Monday - otherwise, I'll just submit what I have.

A request to assist me: please cast me as a stock character.

I didn't do it. I'll try to figure it out.

Hey Z, what happened to the archives?

I got a phone call this morning from the woman who commissioned me to do the bondage photos. Apparently *she* got a rather frantic phone call from the paramour, who actually had a bit of a moment, telling her that no-one has ever done anything so nice, so thoughtful, so touching for him (as she put it, "I was afraid he was going to lose his shit and declare undying love or something, but then I called him back and he's a bitch again so it's okay.") I am a good-deed fairy!

Thursday, February 14, 2002

Well, at least Zach and I can agree on something. Any holiday observed with free samples of Viagra and really bad animated e-cards ought to be banned.

For Valentine's Day, one of the Zang folken sent out an old photo of one of our number, face-down and with a cucumber sticking out of his butt.

Valentine's Day is the most miserable day of the whole goddamn year. Love should be illegal.

Wednesday, February 13, 2002

Thanks for all the bookclub suggestions. We decided to read Motherless Brooklyn by Jonathan Lethem. It's about a detective with Tourrett's syndrome. Here's the link on Amazon

Tuesday, February 12, 2002

oh my god!!!! aunty guava blue eggplant monster?!!! that is amazing! i wanna be that creative.

hmm. well, goodbye greensoboro. i'll actually miss you. and i'll REALLY miss all the precious people you contain.

I tried reading "Cloudsplitter" and didn't finish it - an extremely rare occurence. Mitigating circumstances: I misplaced it, it was overdue back at the library, and I was having an emotional meltdown.

Last night I slapped on a mud mask and my nephew shrieked with laughter and then proceeded to call me "Aunty Guava Blue Eggplant Monster." He just cracks himself up. I wish I were five again so I understood.

This morning I got dressed in the dark and half asleep, so my faded blue jeans, powder blue t-shirt, and navy blue hoodie seemed like a good idea. Finished it off with a soft, creamy mohair cap, and the deli manager called me "Blueberry Tallcake." Then I had to disarm the most unstable member of the stocking crew - he tried to attack me with a sweet potato. All in good fun, but when we say that boy is crazy, we mean he is certified and stamped.

Steph, my book club just did "The Alphabet Versus the Goddess: the conflict of word and image" by Leonard Shlain. And I know it has the Oprah stamp on it, but if you have not read "The Poisonwood Bible" by Barbara Kingsolver, please do so now. I read "The Heart is A Lonely Hunter" about five times in high school and then again a couple years back. Carson McCullers. Oooo.

After, click on the link for I'm not the only one who thinks plastic goldfish make a nifty accessory.

Angie, I made a potato leek soup last night, and instead of boullion cubes I put in a couple of handfuls of the garlic seasoning you sent me. Rave reviews. I am getting the impression that all reviews of my pre-Miss Angie cooking was made up of polite lies.

Zach, good lord. You know about every kind of music there is out there, and between you and Mike y'all can put Publisher's Weekly out of business. I feel like such the un-informed slacker ass.

Anyways, now for my bitch.

I think I may have mentioned that my little community radio station that introduced me to a whole new world of music is going through some changes. It's part of the Pacifica Network, based out of Berkley. Pacifica is millions in the hole, and a group of far left activist sued the station, draining it even more financially.

Now they have taken over the stations, and essentially ousted 90 percent of the staff. Word is that they are going to completely throw out the music programming to replace it with public affairs talk radio. I'm all about community radio, and I think what these newbies can't seem to figure out is that music builds as many communites as talk radio.

So a group of concerned listeners have gotten together to do something about it by buidling bridges with some of the board members who are more sympathetic than not. Yours truly got roped into spearheading the communications committee (does this surprise anyone?). Funny thing is that everyone loves to rant and rave their shit and talk about how important communications is, but when it comes time to sign up, they don't do shit. Talk the talk, but not walk the walk.

I'll bet anything that after I get things together and such, everybody and their mama is going to have input. And you know what Miss Angie Joe is going to tell them, don't you?

Russell Banks should only be read with a shotgun in one hand facing the door. That guy is a great writer, but goddamn he's grim.


If you're into bestsellers, the Corrections is as near to perfect as any book I've read in years. Zadie Smith's White Teeth is a great first novel, too. Both books are surprisingly similar in style to Kavalier and Clay (which, for those of you who haven't read it, is fantastic). All of Chabon's books are good, especially his first The Mysteries of Pittsburgh. What kind of books do you like? I've got suggestions for everything.

Upma - that's so sweet. I don't really ever go to Chipotle, but thanks for thinking of me. Weezie - I'll be emailing you a current pic my dad took when most of my family was visiting a few weeks ago.
So has everyone of this board dyed their hair a new color in the last two weeks?
My Monday: sushi eating with the book club - we just finished up The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay. You guys have any suggestions of good books to read next? I had the Buddha roll- tofu, cucumber and avocado and miso soup, man, I love miso soup. Then I went and saw this lindy/swing band Victrola at the Empanada Parlor - a guy at work is their clarinet/banjo/saxophone player. They were really enjoyable.
Now I'm going to chain myself to my desk until I get more work done. Have a great day everyone.

steph, as i was packing, i found a coupon for a free order of tacos or a burrito for Chipotle Mexican Grill (45th and Lamar). it doesn't have any kind of expiration date on there (as far as i can tell)... would you be able to use it? if so, i'll send it.

Upma: the quarkers are your pandlords. I thought about that this morning during my drive to work. Cracks me up. For everyone else, last night, Upma mistyped. What she meant was "the Quakers are your landlords."

JT: we missed us some JT lovin'.

I have a rant, but I'm too tired to write about it right now (about my radio station efforts). More later from home.

Monday, February 11, 2002

JT, I printed a few of the Paris pictures out for my collage. I think I was about the same shade of green as your hat. Glad to have you back!

J.T. - welcome back. I really liked the pictures in Paris.
Okay - Cyberworld 3D - wow. I went to a 3D IMAX of different animated shorts.
wow. I spent most of the movie with my mouth agape. It was so fantastic. If it comes to an IMAX near you, go. Just go. I felt like a little kid, totally amazed and blown away by the worlds I was seeing before me. Underwater, future utopias, monkey robot sushi, just wow.
Rest of the weekend - birthday party attended, one too many mexican martinis consumed, photo shoot with the cutest dog doing tricks, dance class, and secret shopping of a terrible movie (Orange County- so bad - but at least it was free).

Sunday, February 10, 2002

Dear sweet lakeeffectors. I apologize for my absence from the list. I've been in Paris, and then in withdraw from Paris and now I'm in busy, and thankfully, otherwise I might realize in what a bad way I'm really in.

Buffalo's sweet gray is my constant, tangible thing with sometimes snow that makes me stare and float and smile. Right now there is wind and wind and the sound of tiny pieces of cold rain trying so hard to be ice hitting the window. It hasn't been nearly cold enough. Of all the lakeeffect colors so far the two I've liked the most have gotten the least amount of response. Our original gray, but it's obvious that that color (as well as the name of our page) has some real significance for me, and purple, the fading color of my hair, of my entire being. I orignally liked the blue against our current green but it hardly seems shocking anymore. I thought I might turn my entire text into a link just to spice things up, a mere threat the way pink was. I've always been more concerned about what our site has said than how it's looked. Not that I'm discouraging any efforts to make what's readable more readable.

Pictures of me in Paris at:

I've been reading and re-reading your posts, my respones are slow and outdated by the time I've thought about them enouugh to write. The speed at which snow falls in these storms, that's how you write, with incredible accumulation.

I found out this past week that I'm an aspiring feminist, which makes me a traitor to both causes. If only finally knowing your struggle made it any easier.

My new little big pop swatch keeps telling me now that it's time to take a bath, bath, bath, bath and then it will say sleep, sleep, sleep 21,600 times, (but only if I'm lucky, and more if I've been blessed)

Listen to mid Lemon-heads (with Juliana Hatfield), Richard Buckner, Luigi Nono, Xenakis, a littel Bjork, Pierre Henry, the Swirlies and you will hear what I hear. Close your eyes and think the world is very cold and you are very warm, and you will see what I see, feel what I feel. I'm drawing my bath, I hope you are too.

i forgot to mention earlier... zach, that Swearing At Motorists guy is also from Dayton, OH.

Saturday, February 09, 2002

I've done no work on the bios at all, because I've been lazy. But, also because Kainui is the only one who has sent anything. I'll get to it though. I promise.

dammit. non of you are as lame as me and online on a saturday night. well... i just wanted to share my excitement...
i just saw this movie called Haiku Tunnel (not the greatest movie, not the worst, either... it's funny enough... a little dialogue heavy. but it's based on a monologue, so...)
ANYWAY. at the end, at the credits... i saw one of my film buddy's listed! do you know how exciteing that is to see your friend's name on the big screen?! (although, i saw a short he did in austin two years ago, but that was a short. THIS is a feature... and in a real small-town theatre!)
i'm exciiiited. i'm gonna go e.mail him now.

I tried to dye my hair purple again by layering pink and blue dye. Instead, years too late, I have achieved the perfect goth girl blue-black. Black with navy blue lights indoors, black with cobalt blue nimbus outdoors. I'm going to have to try to be more interesting if I expect to keep up with my hair.

Zach, how goes the Lake Effect bio page? Which reminds me...Angie, Steph, if you could send me a picture of yourself or a picture representative of yourself - I'm making a collage for the fridge in Indiana (one more way to create instant home feeling). And if any of the rest of you want to add more to my collection?

I woke up this morning to find that I was sharing the (very large) bed with both my sisters and my nephew. Got that odd feeling like I wanted to cry and vomit at the same time, realizing I'm leaving. soon.

Friday, February 08, 2002

two family funnies.

one. tinnie (aunt yoplait) has befriended a gay man who recently ended things with his lover for whatever reason. apparently they've been hanging a lot lately. so much that he had a dream about her -- they were in a restaurant parking lot, and she refused to get out of the car until she found her coupon. man, does he have her number!!!!

two. all of this mardi gras stuff reminds me of the st. paddy day irish italian parade in NOLA. every year some crazy fuck throws whole heads of cabbage from off the floats. well, i vividly remember when my grandmother (all of like 4"11) would chase after the cabbage, try to get me to help her, only to cook the shit for dinner that night. how embarrassing is that shit????

Upma, I have decided that instead of packing, I'm boxing stuff up for donation. It is almost as much of a pain, I have discovered.

There is a high-pitched screaming sound only I can hear: I am having a control-freak nightmare. I'm still upgrading software, and I can't seem to upgrade the blasted operating system for reasons I have yet to figure out. Picture, if you will, me glaring at the computer and saying "I AM the admin, dammit, you will do as I command!" It's working about as well as you'd think. Even with all this, I still want an iBook.

Steph/Angie/Shelly/Upma: letter of intent (just about done) and rough of essay posted on teapot.

Have a good weekend everyone. Upma - good luck with the packing. I'm contributing to a yard sale tomorrow so I need to go clean out my closets tonight. Not fun. At least I have a birthday party to go to afterwards.
So I just transmitted a slide from NASA with the following caption: the dark lava plains of the Marginis and Smytthii Basins, taken by Galileo, left part of the Moon visible from Earth - aren't astronauts poetic?
Went down for the First Thursday on S. Congress last night - saw lots of art scene hipsters, oogled over too expensive fun purses and skirts, wondered why no one was at the kissing booth but at the face painting booth instead, listened to a band and ran into an old friend.

if anyone wants to come help pack....?

Thursday, February 07, 2002

John teaches high school art.

Z: I used to love the Breeders. Man, I didn't realize they were touring. What does John teach?

I don't think I mentioned this but I joined a bowling league. I suck ass at bowling, but I decided to join with my pal Mike. It's so much fun because none of us are super competitive, and we just all kind of hang out. I bowled an all-time high of 129 tonight (I normally average like a 70 or 80!!!).

Does any one have any good movie rental suggestions? I wanted to see Amorres something or another, but Christine has already seen it.

Angie, as one of my sisters puts it, "It's not that I *want* to be in control, it's that I *have* to be in control."

The nephew is just fine, and harrassing the cat. I'm seeing a band-aid in his future.

Went to see the Breeders last night. Time and drug addiction have not been kind to the Deal sisters. We joked that the tour should be named "the Breeders Help Kelly Make it Through Recovery" tour 2002. Kim looked bad, no question. But in comparsion to Kelly, she was the model of good health. Poor Kelly. Whew. She's gained about a hundred pounds. Weight gain is common for recovery, I guess. She chain smokes. She can't play. They had a third guitar player just so she wouldn't have to play the hard parts. She sweated like she was roasting in hell. We were a little afraid she would have a heartattack on stage.

Kim wasn't much better. She played consistantly, although I wouldn't say well. But, she shook and got drunker and drunker as the night went on. It was a little discouraging to watch as one sister, clearly an alcoholic, got plastered, while the other sister, recovering from heroin, watched on.

One sort of funny thing, is that with the extra weight and dyed black hair, Kelley looked a hell of a lot like John's mom. He goes, "Whoa, dude, what's my mom doing on stage?" John's mom, of course, is a not nearly the shabbles that Kelley Deal was. But, the do look a lot alike. Both have cute round faces with thin, squinty eyes.

I'm happy to say they weren't struggling. They were having a geniunely good time on stage. And, as a consequence, we did too. It was fun. The band was very under-rehearsed. They plowed through "Cannonball" like they hadn't heard it since 1995. But, it was actually quite endearing. They weren't afraid to admit it either.

There was some weird shit going on too. Like, for example, Kim told us that she had taken her "monthly shower" and had put mayonnaise in her hair as conditioner. Therefore, everytime she put her hair behind her ears, her hands got greasy. By the end of show, a helpful fan in the front was sweeping her hair back for her. It was a hoot.

And their entire road crew is latino. That, in and of itself, isn't strange, but the juxtoposition was noticable. There are these two late-thirties Ohio white trash drug abusers on stage with a latino drummer, guitarist, bassist, guitar tech and drum tech, all of whom were like ten years younger than the Deals. I guess is that their backing band was a band before the Breeders. Because, really, the only other thing to assume is that the Deals are really into young latino men and set about forming a band on those guidelines. And they're from Dayton, Ohio. How many WHITE rockers can there be in Dayton, much less a talent pool of alt-rock hispanic dudes. The Breeders and Guided By Voices are it for Dayton, right?

We stood right at the stage with some of John's students. They were really jazzed, because I think it was their first concert. After the show, Kelley handed the girls the setlists and then she and Kim signed them. It was very gracious and very cool and the girls loved it. They were on cloud nine. Hell, Kelley and Kim were on cloud nine too.

Ok, I don't know WHERE I was for Weezie's Jan. 31st posting. I can't believe that it slipped right past me. But, Upma set you set the record straight, and I couldn't have said it any better.

I think that many of us just have a tendency to take care of others before ourselves -- friends, families, co-workers, partners, whatever. Then we just end up forgetting about ourselves, getting all agitated, then scratching ourselves on the head wondering why the hell we're in such a bad ass mood. Gee, that takes a genius!

Weezie, I, too, am a huge ass control freak. I'm trying to become a reformed control freak, slowly but surely. Way to handle the nephew.

Not sure about the friends after several years. It's only been 3, and I live a state away. Clarification: I don't mean you shouldn't be cordial. I'm all about that. You just don't need to force yourself into uncomfortable social situations.

Upma, you are going to rock in Philly. Across the street from work. That is so awesome. You can run home for lunch. You can wake up 10 minutes before you have to get to work. You can take power naps in your own bed!!!!! That is awesome.

Wednesday, February 06, 2002

Thank you ladies, lesson taken. And if I may refer to an admonition Angie has given me before, my mantra is "I am not Jesus." "I am not Jesus." I know that even if I dropped everything and moved to Portland, it would not mean everything would be okay, and there is a good chance that my controlling tendencies would mean that Erin wouldn't be making some of the growth she would need for when I would not be around.

This was interrupted by my nephew running into the house yelling and with blood running down the side of his face. Just another event where my training comes to the fore: stayed cucumber cool, got him calmed down and cleaned up. Now I'm a bit shaky, because he's fine and now I can get a little freaked out. And he says he won't be spinning around and throwing the golf club up in the air anymore.

I have found that it is possible to be friends after a relationship. Several years afterwards. If you really cared for each other as friends before. And you are never alone together in a private space. I have also learned how to be honest and navigate the choppy social waters afterwards - what can I say, it's a small island and you *will* run into each other. I would say that people here tend to be more openly honest and willing to be cordial for just that reason. As for not dating friends - I went on a blind date and found out that our parents were buddies in college. One more reason to leave the island.

angie, that lesson is true 99% of the time. don't forget it. and when you do, come talk to me, i'll set you straight.
what do you need help with? loosen up on your rules about what friends you can or cannot have. everything will always work out... and everything that is meant to be will always be.
by the way, thanks for preaching the ""fuck everyone else.... just worry about you" line cuz it reminded me....

... louise. i wanted to lecture you the other night, but then we got into that big chat party, and i got distracted and stuff. SO. here goes. in re: to your posting on Jan 31st... um... ok. NO.
i was going to tell you the exact same words angie said tonight. different situation, same rules. really... you gotta take care of yourself first and foremost. you are your first (and really, only) responsibility. until you have 7 kids... then they'll be your responsibility too.
of course you have loyalty towards your friends... and that's so important. but, you really have to have loyalty towards yourself first. you're there for her... you're supporting her, you are always no more than a phone call away. and for a time, you'll even get to be there physically. that's more than enough. feel satisfied that you get to help and support in probably the most difficult time... she'll be fine when you are not there. and you'll be fine too, because you will be taking care of yourself. did i miss anything?

if i may add an addendum to zach's manual for posting images... JPEGS are for photographs and gifs are for illustrations. you can use tif files... for photo's, but for the web, it's really not necessary. and it just uses more space than you need.
also, if you have photoshop, open the file in image ready, change the resolution of your photograph or gif image to 72. it may change the size, which is good. you don't need extra large photographs on the web. also, when you save it, "save as optimized" otherwise you'll get a broken image when you post it.
i don't remember if fetch is actually legit anymore... ? but mac users can use the trial version of transmit which works pretty well. and again, when it asks you to buy, just ignore it.

and mike, thank you. by the way.. that strategy is what they teach us in screenwriting class... it works for me. good luck!

the new digs is tiny. (that sounds grammatically incorrect, but i can't say "are" cuz it's only one place). anyway... it's good for the next 6 months. i'm not in love with it.... BUT... i do have a dishwasher AND a washer and dryer right in my unit. also, i'm on the 8th floor AND i'm right across the street from work.

Ok Mike, you sparked a tangent.

I know I've probably went off on this before, but for real . . . . I am a firm believer in not being "friends" after you date someone. It just doesn't work, and I think people are complete fools to try to convince themselves that it will. Besides, who has the energy to pretend like everything is all good when really it ain't? And you just can't take back the whole "I'm really attracted to you" bit. Because regardless of how serious or casual it is/was, there is some sort of chemistry going on there. It's one thing to have friends who you flirt with. But dating is just different.

I dunno. Maybe I am just too content with the set of friends I already have, and like my friend Robin says, "I ain't takin' applications for pals/buds/friends."

I guess that I am saying I could never date a friend, because I know that if it would ever end, it would be final. Although I'm supposed to be searching for my best friend in the opposite sex? Fucked up, I know.

None of this shit makes sense right now. Somebody help!!!!!!!

Moral of the tangent: fuck everyone else; just worry about you.

Upma, Mike is just being silly. Aren't you Mike. Nod your head. Good. Because we wouldn't want anything happening to the first 27 pages of that book, would we.

Two more people have asked me if I'd be willing to expand my Polaroid oeuvre. If this turns into a lucrative part-time job, I am going to be soooo embarrassed when I tell my former professors at the university (because it's the kind of place where they'll find out anyway).

mission accomplished-- i got a TINY one bedroom apt for 6 months in Center City Philly.

so. on an educated guess, the patriots are from boston?

why does mike need to vault conversations between him and louise? what secrets are they keeping?

work. so much of it. be back later.

Tuesday, February 05, 2002

Where is everyone?

Last night I had a meeting of the minds for individuals who are concerned with Pacifica and the new management at the radio station. They are a good group of people; I just hope that no one gets sidetracked. I found myself making bread pudding last night for our secretary's b-day. She wanted rum sauce, but we don't have an office kitchen so the sauce would have burnt in the microwave. Instead I brought vanilla bean ice cream. Yum and told everyone to nuke the bread pudding for 30 seconds.

Zach, wow, that was a lot of trouble that you went through. And thanks for the web space. You're a rock star.

Monday, February 04, 2002

For those of you without your own computers, keep sending stuff to me and I'll upload it for you. But, I think you should learn the

Okay, posting pictures is really very easy. You need
three things.

1. An image saved as a jpeg or bmp or tif.

2. A FTP (file transfer protocol) program. PC users
can download a trial version of a
CuteFTP is a rock-ass program. Even the trial
version. Its very simple to figure out and use. Mac
users should look into Fetch, which is also quite easy
to use, but I'm not sure if you can get it free. I
bet you can though.

3. Some webspace. I would be EXTREMELY surprised if
you don't all have a little webspace somewhere. If
you are paying for internet service, you've got some.
You're paying for it and you should use it. If you're
getting free service, at school, for example, you've
still probably got some webspace dedicated for your
use somewhere. Users of free email services, myself
included, have a little free space with the email
service. For example, by having a account,
I have a geocities account just waiting for me to use.
I don't because geocities blows ass and because you
can't link images from there, but it exists
nonetheless. Also, most of the free email programs
have uploading (FTP) services included on the page

Once you have all of these things you can post a
picture to the web (using CuteFTP) in a few keystrokes.

Let's test it. First download and install your FTP
program. They aren't very big and should download and
install quickly. I'm assuming you chose CuteFTP. In
about 30 days its going to ask you if you want to buy
the program. If and when I use it more often, I
probably will, cause it does unlock some functions
that are worth having, but for now the trial version
is ok. If you get this "Buy now" window, simply click
on "close."

Our house has about 10MB of space that we've been using for our band websites. I'm going to donate some of this space
to Lake Effect, for now. There is a Lake Effect folder inside the Dirty version directory. I'm going to email you
the username and password you need to access the
space. Please, make sure you don't give the password
to anyone who isn't on this blog.

Go to CuteFTP. A page should pop up within the program. It is the "site manager" screen. If you don't see it, when you open the program, in the lefthand corner of the main screen there is a little book looking button. Click on it. Click "new" at the bottom of the site manager. In the space "label for site" type "lake effect" (or "booger alarm" or "jack mammy" or whatever you want to call it). In "ftp host address" type "" (without the quotation marks, of course). Then it asks for user name and password. Then port number, which is 21. Then login type, which should be "normal."

Now, click on connect. If everything is cool, you'll get a login messages page after a few seconds. Click Ok. If your screen is set up like mine on the main page you'll see one long window that shows tranfer messages on top. Then two facing windows. In the left one, you see the contents of your computer. In the right one, you see the contents of the website. Take a second to find the right directory on the right screen. Click "www." Then Choose "dirtyversion." (btw, everything you see in the "dirtyversion" folder in on our band site, so please be careful not to delete anything.) Then "lakeeffect." To transfer files, simply find you files on the left screen and double click on them. They are now online.

To check go to your Internet browser and type in "" with XXXXX.jpg being whatever you named your image. If you did it right, it should appear.

If it does, go to the Blogger site and type this HTML tag into you message anywhere you want it:

img src:""

Type it just like that including the interior quotation marks, but replacing XXXXX.jpg with the name of you image. But! so, I could show you how the tag looks without it drawing up a picture, I left off the beginning and end brackets. It should be written like this . Get it? remember to use the < and > brackets or it won't work.

Hey! Our demo is done. I'll try to post some songs soon. Yeah!

Also, I'm working on a step by step intro to posting images. I'll finish it tonight.

My parents came in town last Thursday and I spent through Sunday playing cruise director. We went to the LBJ library (they're having a special exhibit "Treasures of the Harry Ransom Center") So who was Harry Ransom? and damn did he have a lot of money! I saw Milton's Latin essay from age 16, first edition Shakespeare's, the Gutenberg bible (a gem of the collection), the first photograph, Frieda Kahlo painting, Diego Rivera painting, letter to Hemingway from his mom (best line: A mother's love is like a bank, and you son are overdrawn). We went to this great nature photography exhibit at a gallery near 5th and Lamar. Saw breathtakingly large color nature photos. We also walked up Mt. Bonnell (sore quads the next day), walked around Mayfield Park (one with peacocks - did you know that peacocks roost in trees? cause I sure didn't). We also walked down South Congress (or SoCo as it's more fun to call) and went in all the cool junk shops there. I took lots of pictures on that walk and made some Polaroid transfers last night. It was photodorkwonderful. We have this gallery section at work where I'll probably hang a few of my favorites. We also did many super yum meals - NXNW, Mezzaluna, Asti (my new favorite restaurant in Austin - I love their risotto - how did I go so long without consuming mass quantities of risotto - I just don't understand). Also my folks and brother and sister-in-law got to meet Ted. I was expecting much more interrogation, but it went really smoothly. Now Ted's parents come in two weeks and we do it all again.
So I had a dream last night that I was Sisyphus and some combination of Hercules cleaning out the Augean stables. I had to clean up this impossibly messy room and had to keep doing load after load of laundry while people kept putting more things in the room. I think it's from work stress - my math book has kicked into high gear.
Oh, so I had my first country western dance class with Ted yesterday afternoon (once again eternally grateful to date a boy who's willing to dance). I was all snob about taking a beginner's class but we ended up doing a different basic pattern than I'm used to so now I have to remember to the do the reverse (I know slow, slow, quick, quick and the class teaches, quick, quick, slow, slow). So my feet need to now pay attention to my brain.
Well - work calls and yells and screams and must be paid attention to.

Zach, be my superhero - how does one post pictures here?

Mike's description of Boston sounds a lot like the scene in Barcelona when their soccer team won some big-ish competition. People hanging off lightposts and all that. Here? What I noticed was no traffic, driving to and from work. There was a DJ this morning who kept announcing that the Rams had won by 22 points.

I spent my morning discovering that I'm actually quite good at taking bondage pics with a Polaroid camera. "Okay, arch your back a bit more - can you stick your ass out just a bit more? Good. Now see if you can hook the riding crop behind the heels of your shoes and pull up...GREAT! Now turn just a bit to your left...the light reflecting off the vinyl looks really good." *click* Now she's going to bind them into a little book as a Valentine's gift for her paramour. L'amour!

Sunday, February 03, 2002

I would guess that one of my roommate turned my computer on while I am away (in Hickory), because my room is actually the common room of the damn house.

To say that the green isn't bad is very patriotic.

Has JT returned from Paris? Or is he still blissfully wandering the rues and boulevards?

Angie, thank you for looking out for my boy Zach. You know I love him but my aesthetic sense just snaps sometimes. Your reading kick sounds fun!

Zach, you are silly, silly, silly, but I love you anyway. Why is that my buddy list says that you are logged on but you don't seem to be? Or is that you are just too afraid that I'll learn your secret ninja ways if we communicate directly? What's up with that?

Yesterday morning I walked in a 5K, and then went to the Kenny Rogers concert with my aunt. Do you ever notice how some people look like they are fans? I swear I had about 5 KR spottings last night. Same thing at the James Taylor concert. They just LOOK like they'd listen to those musicians. Not a bad thing, just funny as all get out.

Ok so hopefully I'm on my reading kick again. I finished "Meely LaBave" which was about a little Cajun boy, written by a WSJ reporter who grew up in S. Louisiana. Yesterday I checked out "Harry Potter" to see what all the damn hype was about.

Weezie: Zach will not be allowed to pick the party favors and/or the color schemes. I'm afraid of what you'll do to him if he has that kind of power. Zach, just trying to look out for you.

Saturday, February 02, 2002

Ten hut! Military green!

You know Angie, maybe having Mike do the events planning isn't that scary. Not as scary as having Zach do the planning, anyway.

Angie, don't let Mike be in charge. Don't let me be in charge. Mike, I can categorically deny everything.

I went to an open mike which was a great reminder of why I sometimes think it shouldn't be quite so open. Some of it was hideous, some of it was transcendent. Hideous? Think karaoke "Man of La Mancha." Note to singer: just because you can sing loud doesn't mean you sound good. And then I went out with some friends specifically so that we could have the kinds of philosophical debates where the fur flies and people get red in the face and then we all hug afterwards. On the table tonight: spirituality, culture, and "pure" vs "corrupt" societies. Think "Waking Life" with less coherence and more yelling (which was mainly because of the loud music being played in the restaurant). I spent some time convincing the very spiritual "America is so corrupt" guy to quit apologizing for his ideas and to please, please stop worrying about offending or upsetting us - and to actually try to offend and annoy. He's kind of getting the hang of it.

Friday, February 01, 2002

Ok, putting Mike and Weezie in charge isn't a scary thought or anything!!!!!

For those of us without AOL, you can pretty much download and use AIM for free as long as you have an ISP.

I feel like I've earned three weekends instead of one!

Mike: you read such a variety of genres. Go head on with your big bad self.